I Found Some Blog

a division of the Chersonian Institute

Category: Music (Page 32 of 34)

Meet Cher! And Other Opportunities for the Obsessed

June 13, 2008 / / 2 Comments

Cherwedding Apparently, Cher was spotted at Foxtail restaurant in West Hollywood this week. Now don’t go looking for those pictures the crazy paparazzi take. Just be content in the knowledge that you now know where she was for 30 minutes one day of the year in 2008. A real knuckle-brained, celebrity-obsessed thing to do would be to actually go there and pretend you were actually having dinner there with Cher. Honestly, that’s exactly the type of activity I don’t recommend. Hey, I’m just doling out some tough love for you right now…because I essentially see the I Found Some Blog as a support group environment – deep down.

A better use of your celebrity obsessed dollars would be to try to win a charity auction where you could actually meet Cher backstage. And by participating you’ll be providing a community service to a charity, which as we discussed last week might just offset the side-effects of too much celebrity obsession, which in its pure form, helps no one.

Here’s the press release:

MEET CHER BACKSTAGE AT HER LAS BEGAS SHOW ON SEPTEMBER 20, 2008!": This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for you and a companion to enjoy Cher during a live performance at her Las Vegas show at the Colosseum at Caesar's Palace and meet her backstage. This fantastic package also includes coach class airfare for two aboard JetBlue AND two night's accommodation that weekend at Caesar's Palace.

AUCTION CLOSES: Jun 24, 2008 12:14:00 PM

FOR MORE INFORMATION: Visit charitybuzz. com

PROCEEDS FROM THE EVENT WILL BENEFIT: The Jorge Posada Foundation, a non-profit organization established by the New York Yankees' All-Star Catcher, Jorge Posada, and his wife, Laura. Proceeds will help the foundation reach out to families in need, whose children are affected by Craniosynostosis, and provide them with emotional support through its family support network; provide financial assistance to underwrite a portion of the costs of initial surgeries in its partner medical centers; and encourage further research of this medical condition. The Foundation also strives to create awareness about the condition through events and through funding other educational outreach efforts.

Direct Link: https://auction01.charitybuzz.com/secure/viewItemDetail.do?auction_item_id=743030

This week we had a financial setback and we think we may have to postpone the wedding for a year. This actually takes me out of the meeting-Cher-via-auction business. But that’s not so much my bag really. Anyway, even though our party-plans have now moved from a boil to a simmer, I’m still on the look-out for some Cher 70s-era dance tracks. This week, the remix of Dark Lady appeared here: http://bcubsmusic.blogspot.com/2008/06/cher-dark-lady.html

The remix is compressed on that site and I couldn’t extract it myself but apparently you can download a free trial version of WinRAR to do this: http://www.rarlabs.com/.

81ab_1 And here’s a celebrity-obsessed project I can fully endorse: creating your own fan-art – be it functional fan-art like purses made of record-albums or classic fan-art like Cher paintings or even Cher-doll-art. This crafty fan has recreated the outfit from Cher’s Caesar’s poster for the newer Cher doll.
Ae28_1
By the way, JimmyDean recently suggested I use this dress as my wedding dress prototype.  But I kind of prefer this dress at the top as a prototype. Do you have any other suggestions?

And collecting ancient Cher artifacts is another Cher-obsessed activity that’s harmless in small doses. You can find even more Chertiques at this new trading site: http://www.ioffer.com/search/items/cher/text_pics/ioffer/0/false

Go crazy kids! Can someone loan me a dollar for a lottery ticket?

  

What Shall We Talk About?

May 8, 2008 / / 4 Comments

Okay…so the big day arrived this week and reviews are literally pouring in on Cher’s Caesar Place show. I don’t want to read them until I see the show next week. I don’t even want to look too hard at the photos. I don’t want to discuss the new stuff until I see it. Which is extremely,  extremely hard!

In fact, for any of the other tours (there have only been three I’ve been able to see live in my lifetime – Heart of Stone, Believe, and Never Can Say Goodbye), I’ve never been able to resist. And I’m getting very, very excited about seeing the show and reading over everybody’s thoughts. I just hope I don’t get hit by a bus before I can see it! (I always think that right before new Cher product drops).

In fact, I don’t feel like talking about anything else but this thing I can’t talk about!!

But I did post my France pics and here are the Cher-centric ones:

 

Seine John on the Seine like that Sonny & Cher album back cover pic.

 

 

 

 

Cherentry2_2Cherceiling1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don’t these chateaux entryways look like Cher’s house??

 

Chercem Chercem2_2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I can totally see why Cher wants to be buried at Pere LaChaise cemetery in Paris. It’s very goth. I can see her with a tomb not unlike the one above, but hopefully with some subtle half-breed design in the stained glass…hey, for the fans.

 

Cher_sign

 

 

 

 

 

Cher river, Cher valley, Cher county seat…lots of Cherness in the Loire Valley.

I can also take this time to answer a few Cher questions from the blog.

Jimmy wrote:

“AND, Mary, why haven’t you digressed about the fact that these unlikely 3 would do something together so out-of-line for their personalities???? love and kisses-jimmy”

Jimmy is right. I could easily do an essay about the old 70s-variety format and how we just don’t get miraculous celebrity combinations singing medleys apropos of nothing like we did back in the day. It’s heartbreaking because I’d watch any show that could convince Bono to sing a Madonna medley with Barney and Tiger Woods. Who wouldn’t watch that?? It’s TV Gold.

Michael asked:

“Okay, so combining “she’s overdue a juicy boxed-set” and “It’s my dream job really”…How about you tell us what you would put in the ultimate Cher box? Anything you ever wanted on CD, DVD, books, whatever. I’m totally curious what you’d put.

There’s so much I could do as curator of a Chersonian Institute. Really, I don’t know where to start. Her video collection needs a serious overhaul.  More and more we’re finding amazing gems of foreign video clips for old Cher hits on the you-tubes.

I haven’t wrapped my head around what a good box-set of CDs would be. I know the mix I normally make my friends has too many non-hits on it to ever make bank. Other than the obvious of doing notes for the four-CD Warner Bros 1975-1977 re-release collection we’re so overdue, I don’t know what other regurgitation of her greatest hits I would feel morally okay with dumping into the pile of too-many-already.

I would love to do a coffee-table book of photographs and essays compiled by various writers on Cher’s career and her cultural relevance. That would be the dreamiest.

 

The Cher Show is Coming…The Cher Show is Coming!

May 1, 2008 / / 1 Comment

Cheret Excitement is brewing for the new Cher show in Las Vegas (premiering in just 6 days). I’m very excited, speaking for myself. Although I must say gas prices have inhibited my ability to afford a plane ticket to Vegas for the weekend I’m going to see it. They’re off the charts. And I even have a $100 voucher. Big sigh. I may end up driving, which I enjoy anyway. I just want to use the damn voucher before it expires in two months. But I digress…

Also, this week Oprah filmed Tina Turner and Cher in her Las Vegas episode which is set to air on May 8. Set thee Tivos. Here’s a link to some of the gossip about the episode which was posted on Cher World.

Other links this week

Chershow1_2In light of that, there was a funny blog post last week from The Cher Show, the episode with Tina Turner and Kate Smith and it reminds us how charismatic Tina and Cher are together. The blog post is funny, too.

Moveme And two good links were posted this week on the Cher list from Tyler. There’s a new mashup!!! I love these! Cher with Snoop Dog! Here’s the MP3.

And Gregg and Cher singing "Move Me" in concert.

   

Recycling Cher

March 25, 2008 / / 3 Comments

Gschercd Before I go, I’d like to knock off a new Cher CD review, the latest in an endless pile of Cher greatest hits assemblages to tumble out of the great black hole that is Cher Compilation Production. Or maybe instead there’s a factory somewhere at the south pole where elves contemplate various ways to re-combine Cher hits with Cher not-so-much-hits, those same overworked and malnourished elves packaging it all ambivalently into lackluster booklets with ill-researched biographies and ever-mounting accolades stuffed into first or closing sentences of liner note essays written by people we’ve never heard of.

It’s my dream job really.

Universal has a new line called Universal Green Series (Recycle reuse replay), one of those rubber-stamp series sets. I guess you’re meant to collect them all so your CD shelves look swell, like having a shelf lined with Library of America books, only you’re not fooling anybody because everybody knows people with choreographed bookshelves really don’t read.

The Best of Cher (if I had a dime for every Best of Cher CD I own…I’d have something like 7 or 8 dimes) contains the following:

  1. I Got You Babe
  2. The Beat Goes On
  3. Half Breed
  4. Dark Lady
  5. Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves
  6. Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)
  7. Living in a House Divided
  8. The Shoop Shoop Song
  9. We All Sleep Alone
  10. I Found Someone
  11. Just Like Jesse James
  12. Heart of Stone
  13. After All
  14. Love and Understanding
  15. If I Could Turn Back Time

I listened to this new CD driving down Artesia Boulevard in LA with my boyfriend one Saturday morning on our way out for a breakfast of huevos rancheros. Of all the songs, he seems to like…ahem… “Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves” best for its soap-operatic storyline.

Let me take a moment to express my extreme irritation with the constant misspellingGypsys_2 of this song title. Or rather, the constant corrected spelling of this song title. According to Merriam Webster “gypsies” is in fact the correct spelling (http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gypsies); however, the album title is spelled “Gypsys Tramps & Thieves” with a "y" in the plural form of gypsies and an ampersand. I’m just saying titles are sacrosanct and shouldn’t be meddled with even if they’re incorrect. It’s part of their charm.

My boyfriend snickered at "Just Like Jesse James" but that may be my relentless anti-Diane Warren influence talking. As bad Diane Warren songs go, "Jesse James" is so much better than "Love and Understanding." The lyrics drive me nuts; they’re so vapid. If I may encapsulate the great theme of this piece: basically there’s just not enough love and understanding. Love can’t be found when we need it (it seems). “When love’s supply don’t meet love’s demand.” Love, love, love. We seem to have enough stars, sun, cars, planes, buildings, and ambition  – yup we got more than enough of those things. “But there’s one thing there’s just not enough of…” Well, two things technically: love and understanding. We could use some more. Troubled times. Oh why oh why isn’t there enough? What should we do? Where do we stand? We’ve got to find it.

I guess I just don’t have enough love and understanding myself when it comes to explicating this piece of work. But then I would counter that not enough love and understanding was taken with detail and creativity in that pop song.

So back to the CD array of hits at hand (I love to ponder this stuff, I really do). There are two 60s S&C songs (IGUB and Beat Goes On) and three big 70s solo songs (Half Breed, Dark Lady, Gypsys). So far we have no consistent chronological order here. Then rewind to a solo 60s hit (Bang Bang) and back forward to a minor 70s hit (House Divided), then we get whiplash racing ahead to The Shoop Shoop Song which looks like it works as sort of a bridge (skipping over Take Me Home) to her 80s hits. After those, the collection abruptly stops.

Packaging is all 80s pics on cardboard. The bio is brief and full of holes (they have Cher working with Phil Spector when she meets Sonny, as if Phil discovered her not Sonny), and again the story stops short of her 90s comeback, as if it were produced pre-Believe.

Elvisc In summary, this CD is no great shakes as good Cher compilations go (she’s overdue a juicy boxed-set). But I guess I support this label’s cause of recycling. So if someone stole this CD out of my car I wouldn’t cry about it.

Like I still cry over that Elvis Costello CD that was stolen out of my rental car during a trip to Flagstaff two years ago. If you’re out there, you know who you are!

   

On Vacation

March 25, 2008 / / 1 Comment

Babies1 Well kids and kidlets, France is upon me. I’m very excited and I’m getting a bit nervous. But mostly excited…for three reasons. First of all, I’ve never taken a long vacation for myself, even one week away that wasn’t obligated to some dysfunctional family event of some kind. It’s been 40 years of weekend trips here or there just for moi. Secondly, I’ve never left the US…period. Not from not wanting to, mind you. I’ve been wanting to since college. But either I had no money, no vacation time (due to traveling home for Christmas or 4th of July for aforementioned dysfunctional family events), or no courage to go it alone. Thirdly, going to France is a lifelong dream come true, way back to when my brother came home from a week in Le Mans after his high school French three-week trip, bringing back cheese, a porcelain mime doll and news of a hit from Soft Cell. Turns out they were a year ahead of us with “Tainted Love.” How cultured they were! I was in 6th grade and decided it was my destiny to learn French. But lo and behond, French class was pure hell…for six years. But then I met the former French-majoring, Proust-studying bf and he didn’t seem nearly as uptight as all my former French teachers were. My dream was soon re-awakened.

Babies3_2 The bf and I got our euros recently at the Del Amo mall. We have a suitcase full of maps and guidebooks and all our little tubes of toothpaste, fold-up toothbrushes and little bottles of lotions and shampoo. I’ve been cramming French phrases like Mon ami est une moyen-pantalon! and Quel dommage! I’ve started a carnet de voyage, a French-style journal of our trip.

And I promise to look for Cher references while I’m away but you shant be hearing from me. You’re on your own for two weeks. Here’s a list of Cher videos to keep you company.

      

 

Have a great two weeks!

   

Outdoor Album Shots

March 19, 2008 / / 1 Comment

Withlove Remember the albums All I Really Want to Do, Look At Us, Jackson Highway, With Love with that big blue sky behind Cher – all great outdoor album photos taken beyond the suffocating-like walls of a photo studio, all out in the sparkling daylight. I miss the fresh air sometimes, I really do. Can it be that Half Breed (which looks almost like a photo stage itself) was really the last Cher album cover photographed with an outdoor setting?

Cher is a California girl! How I yearn for another album cover with some SUN! 

   

More Bootleg Reviews

March 13, 2008 / / 2 Comments

I want to take a moment to finish up reviewing bootlegs Cher peeps have sent me. Regarding the 60s set I got for purchasing two posters off eBay, I have three clips left. I also just received a new and fabulous DVD from Jimmy (aka gypsy90028) that I’ll start discussing, as well.

Back to the Late 60s…Alfiedress_2

The Smothers Brothers
Most of us have seen Cher singing “Alfie” on this show. I never ceased to be amazed by Cher in that short baby-doll dress.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lDSf0A9RTk

The Jerry Lewis Show
Now this show had some cool effects with background projections and whatnot and Cher arrives with BIG mascara. Things have clearly gotten out of hand in that regard. S&C sing “What Now My Love” and you can see Cher is definitely more confident these days. Lots of finger snapping goin down. And doesn’t Cher have skinny legs though?Kids2

Are they lip synching again? Cher gets ready to sing “You’d Better Sit Down Kids” introducing it proudly as a song “my husband wrote for himself.” I was reminded watching this clip how unusual the song is being about broken homes and change and all, that painful moment when a parent has to explain divorce to their kids. Have you ever heard anything like it…before or since?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJlubAgs7uM

Glen Campbell
We’ve already seen the super-fine duet of Cher singing “All I Really Want to Do” with Glen on his variety show. If not, get his latest DVD. It’s fabulous.

On that episode, Cher also sings “The First Time” in a set looking like a bedroom after a cheap one night stand. Cher’s eyelashes have improved. And she’s growing out her bangs….they look like little orphans, uncut and running away.  She gives Glen a big smile and he asks if Sonny produced that song. She again proudly says that he wrote that song and doesn’t someone in there say “and he can cook too.”

Then things really gets crazy with Neil Diamond. He’s just become successful (and it now occurs to you 40 years later how rarely you see him on TV). Cher is in an Indian top and they all three do a medley of Diamond hits up to that time, which include “Thank the Lord for the Nighttime" (full with emotive ‘Oh Yeahs’), “Kentucky Woman,” “Brother Loves Traveling Salvation Show” and “Sweet Caroline” which we only recently found out is about Caroline Kennedy. Come on, Neil! That ruins it! I thought it was another song about booze all this time!

Now skip to the early 80s…

Blackrose Black Rose on Midnight Special
I had never seen Black Rose in action. And I loved it. I was amazed by it. This is honestly a side of Cher no-one gets to see. It never appears in biographical footage and it’s a phase of her career mostly ignored. And even though I would accept the critique that Black Rose was no great shakes when you stack them against Hall of Famers, they was fairly a good enough new band that could’ve stood up against other new bands out there.

Because it was Cher’s third or fourth or fifth (according to your timeline) incarnation, she brought all her former incarnations’ baggages, infamy and expectations to the act which was unfortunate. Had Cher started her career entirely with this band, they may have evolved and succeeded and we’d probably see Cher as a respected rock singer today alongside our other stellar rock chicks.

And this is one of the many instances where Cher had to pay her dues (not with drugs or alcohol or poverty, but with no respect); and it also exemplifies ironically in reverse why she should be a hall of famer because she took such risky risks musically in almost every musical genre and survived some huge failures but prevailed to bigger and better successes down the line.

Her rock moves here are fully and faithfully performed in “Never Should’ve Started.” Physically she dances with hard rock enthusiasm no one had seen before and would never see from her again. She rebelliously sings the word ‘bitch’ in the song “Julie” and tries to sing eye to eye with Les Dudek in “You Know It.” However, he’s no Sonny. Like Gregg Allman before him and Richie Sambora after him, no "real rocker dude" seems to have the balls to sing while looking Cher dead in the eye so intently as Sonny did. But she kept trying.

For Cher, loving you must mean singing live with you.

Something bothered me throughout the three songs on Midnight Special: who the hell is that guy on the left, the backup singer. He plays air guitar as if he’s the main act. And yet, with that tight shirt, he seems more like a dancing bodyguard than an actual band mate.

And I know she’s trying to dress down now but is that a hole fit she’s wearing under that sweat shirt?? I think I see a sequin.

In any case, out of love for rock music, Cher wanted to be in a band against her career’s common wisdom. And she had enough conviction to try to sublimate her image and name to try to make it work. However, as we all have come to now know: such a thing is ludicrously impossible. And that’s probably the idea at which most of the ridicule started. Therefore, no one give the act a fair, pure looksee.

See? Even Wikipedia considers it "a Cher album"

MontecontrastThe Monte Carlo Show
This DVD also included the Monte Carlo show in its entirety, something I’d never seen before either. I’d been surviving ravenously from clips online. I was so entranced when I watched it I didn’t even take any notes. Now looking back, I must say honestly it felt a little rough compared to Celebration at Caesars a year or so later. Caesars was so smooth and slick and it had that big awesome shoe. I feel the Monte Carlo show stumbles starting directly with Laverne. We expect the big Cher entrance, not a fake out. The fake out with the drag Cher is much better played after the intermission, as Cher did it during her Heart of Stone tour.

However, I love, love, love the outfits in this show. And the dancing makes me nostalgic for the late 70s and early 80s. That encore crotch shot was scandalous! I played it for my bf when he got home!

What really fascinates me is the stupifying contrast between Black Rose and Vegas Cher in 1980. Consider with these:

Merv Griffin clips of Black Rose
(Merv Griffin? No wonder they had a hard time getting steet cred!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=omdLRZE5Zh4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB4aSGF66Qs

Then Monte Carlo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFMc668T8xo
   

Interviews, Videos and Games

February 28, 2008 / / 4 Comments

Glasses This photo is here in honor of the new sun-glasses I bought this week. The rest is miscellaneous knits and gnats:

Tyler on Chergroups posted this interview last week – more preview info on the show plus a sneak peak at the outside of the Cher store! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KNbEv-0DX8

Speaking of Tyler, he did a great video tribute to Cher singing "Nature Boy" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PkQJRLTJ5M with some rare photos. I’m envious of Cherinbevhills_3 his rare photos.

And there’s a new fun online game: Cher or Drag Cher: http://cityrag.blogs.com /main/2008/02/cher-or-drag-ch.html. I missed one!!!

And here’s a photo of Cher in Beverly Hills recently. I love her bun!
   

Holy Smoke! A Political Cher Song

February 11, 2008 / / 1 Comment

Handbasket I know it’s difficult to look into our Cher past when Cher future is so gloriously in front of us. But before the Vegas news broke, Cher Scholar JimmyDeanPartee (gypsy90028) contacted me to discuss the song from Cher’s 1979 album Prisoner “Holy Smoke” in order to see if this piece was still relevant to our troubled modern times.

With the political climate being what it is (see the Ben Sargent cartoon above): an unwanted war, soaring gas prices, the mortgage collapse, stock market woes, US religious-unrest – I do believe it is time to re-explicate this work composed by Michele Aller and Bob Esty. Maybe it will reinvigorate your ambitions to join the political process this year. Remember, it’s your right and it’s your duty.

I mean…come on, people died for you (not only in this war but back during the Revolution). Show them some love for your country and vote. I’ve never missed an election, even the stupid silly ones filled with Arnold Schwarzenegger propositions.

Holysmoke Holy Smoke

Where do we draw the line
on what’s going on   

(Well…you can vote.)

When do we take a stand
and demand to know the truth   

(Uh…about 8 years ago.)

Talk is cheap
Won’t get the problems solved

(Seriously, TV talking heads are not my biggest pet peeve. My real rage comes over those news sources who just print competing lies and fail to investigate the truth of any claims politicians make, giving American yokels the dangerous luxury of continuing to believe whatever cockamamie thing they want to. Case in point was a recent article on Yahoo! News where John McCain accused former Republican candidate Mitt Romney of flip-flopping on issues and Mitt Romney then denying it. No attempt was made to root out a very verifiable truth there: how often Romney did flip flop. Yahoo just presented both statements like a free outlet for them to do a pissing match, lie for lie. Talk is way cheap.)

We’re in too deep
Not to get involved

(If you think gas is expensive now…)

We got the sun for free 

(I never knew that’s what that line was. I guess I always thought it was: we get this song for free.)

So explain to me
Why gas is up a dollar

(More like two-and-a-half dollars.)

I gotta holler holy smoke

(Well, you can holler but as we’ve already ascertained: talk is cheap. Hollering is hillbilly.)

Oh, they say atomic power
could never hurt a flower
Holy smoke

(That flower-power rhyme sounds hippie-ish; Rush Limbach might accuse this song of being a left-wing conspiracy.)

Every quick solution
leads to more pollution
Holy smoke

They say they found the answer
breathing causes cancer

(Okay I thought she was singing: the reed that causes cancer…like smoking reeds…I know it’s stupid; but I was nine when this album came out!)

Holy smoke
All I can say is holy smoke

(clearly)

Why do we turn away
from what’s going on

(Because we’re lazy and celebrity obsessed.)

We’ll ever believe again
in those who hide the truth

Talk is cheap
Won’t get the problems solved
We’re in too deep
Not to get involved
Don’t throw it all a way
it’s easy enough to say

When gas is up a dollar
everybody holler holy smoke
They say atomic power
could never hurt a flower
Holy smoke

Fifty-five or faster
could drive us to disaster
Holy smoke

(I think Sammy Hagar would see the sarcasm in that line, too.)

If I say go on and shove it
The media would love it

(I would have said this wasn’t true anymore: young celebutard’s swear so often; but Cher swore on the Billboard Awards years ago and they made a federal case out of it. Cases in fact, case nos. 06-1760-ag (L), 06-2750-ag (CON), and 06-5358-ag (CON). Read the overview:  http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/06/11/fcc_profanity_ruling/)

Holy smoke
All I can say is holy smoke
Holy smoke

Where do we draw the line

(dramatic music)

When do we take a stand
Why do we turn away
We’ll ever believe again

Talk is cheap
Won’t get the problems solved
We’re in too deep
Not to get involved
Don’t throw it all away

It’s easy enough to say….repeat
Holy holy holy holy
All I can say is holy smoke!

    

Behold the New Wigs: Cher Announces a Celebration at Caesars, Part II

February 8, 2008 / / 3 Comments

Darkwig I’m very very psyched about the fact that Cher is returning to Vegas. It’s always been one of my regrets that I never somehow cohersed my parents into taking me to see one of her shows at Caesars Palace all those moons and decades ago, before her phoenix-like rise to Oscardom.

The new Cher news appeared on two ABC news programs yesterday, Good Morning America and Nightline (basically the same short interview, give or take a shot of her Malibu patio) and longer pieces in USA Today. (Part 1 and Part 2)

I have to say, I dearly love the new wigs. I never liked the straight-style hair Cher sported in the 90s after the fabulous chaos of curls she wore in the 80s. Those Believe wigs always looked desperate to me. No amount of glitter and spackle on them could convince me otherwise. The new wigs are wonderful because they simultaneously give Cher maturity and yet make her look younger, too. Sounds tricky but it works.

And one thing I’ve started to love about Cher articles in the last ten years: the fabulous new "adjective of accolade" they invent to describe her career. Nightline used the word Indomitable.

Press facts at a glance

  • Cher’s up to a 44-year career
  • Caesars Coliseum contains 4,100 seats
  • Cher will perform four shows a week (Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday) in dates set to run in May and then August through October of this year.
  • Ticket prices are $227 for orchestra, $159 for rear-orchestra and $127 and $86 for the balcony seats.
  • She has a three year contract with AEG (three years!!)
  • Rumor has it she will make $60 million for these shows
  • To put that into perspective, the Farewell tour earned about $192 million and was the 9th highest grossing tour in history according to Billboard Boxscore, who also said “Cher was a remarkable endurance test.”
  • Cher told the I-bought-two-frying-pans-in-1965-because-I-thought-I’d-always-return-to-poverty-someday” story again
  • Her estimated worth is $600 million

Other Points of Note

Cher also said it must be hard to be her manager cos she doesn’t know her address or where she is half the time but does still go to grocery store, mostly for Mallomars. Why is the ability to grocery shop always the litmus test of the common man?

Cher talked more openly about depression and how work is a good counterbalance. She said with a smile, “I could make something of my life if I didn’t have depression” and I wasn’t sure if that was tongue-in-cheek or sincerely bittersweet. It was news that she’d had another debilitating bout with Epstein-Barr last year which meant a trip to see those German doctors. This might esplain those cancer rumors.

Cher also scooped up some love dish. Cher talked about Sonny being a scientologist and how she just didn’t get it. She confirmed the Tom Cruise date story. (Where are the pictures, goddammit?) And admitted she was propositioned by both Elvis and Marlon Brando (I can totally see them both being so in to her), but admitted she was too scared to act on a weekend away with Elvis (who knows why she didn’t hook up with Brando, aside from the crazy thing) and said she has regretted it ever since.

Her I’m-still-looking-for-love speech sounded like a bad eHarmony ad, hoever – I must say. My bf would tell her, “stop asking for what you want and start advertising what you could offer to someone else?" (aside from 600 million dollars worth of bling bling.) The ubiquitous “make me laugh” requirement should go out the window for all women universally. Should someone have to make you laugh or should you just laugh. I swear, we just had this very conversation while giving advice to a friend looking for love on Chemistry.com. But Cher’s comment “you just stub your toe over guys” was very funny and astute.

To get into shape for the Caesars shows, Cher plans to start yoga and loves her Power Plate fitness machine. She’s not impressed with American Idol and like Jack Nicholson is supporting Hillary Clinton for president. She said “the guys have had it.” True enough although I would advise keeping that sentiment out of her dating profile for now.

Promises, Promises

  1. “Cher insists her Vegas splash wont recycle Farewell motifs.” This is important. I just had a friend who refused to buy a ticket with us because he said he had no confidence Cher would re-invent the wheel. But Cher maintains she’s revamping the songs and taking the visual aspects one step further with surround effects and complex staging (a different stage for each song), things she couldn’t due on a traveling show with limited technology.
  2. Cher promises elaborate choreography and 4 aerialists. I initially hoped the choreography would be more Caesars 1980 than Farewell 2000 but the Robin Leach blog story claims Doriana Sanchez will be the choreograper once again so I’m expecting more of the unsynchronized same. Professional dancers feel free to educate me on this issue if that seems uneducated.
  3. According to the Leach-blog “An album— her 27th—will be produced from the show!” Well, first of all, Cher already has 30 albums. And would this be a live album or a new studio album? It would be great if Cher could arrange duets with visiting Vegas showmen, like Tom Jones.

This show marks Cher stage reunion of a sorts with Elton John and Bette Midler, who both guest-starred on the premier episode of her Cher solo television series in 1975.  Leach-blog called them "a triumph-irate," a sassy run on the words triumphant triumvirate.

My own thoughts

It fully hit me yesterday that I have an unbelievably exciting year ahead – seriously. I hope I don’t get hit by a bus. I have my first trip out of the country, something I’ve been trying to accomplish my whole adult lifetime, to Paris for 10 days with my bf (who speaks fluent French) and a family reunion in Albuquerque and Santa Fe New Mexico (I’m looking forward to showing my bf that absolutely enchanted state). I’ve got very-good-but-moderately-priced tickets to see Cher at Caesars (a dream come true – now if only she’d only start a television show again so I could sit in the viewing audience I could check off that last dream from 1975). Plus the Los Angeles Times Book Festival. Oh heaven!

And adventures with the new house and the new dog, Franz Alonzo, who just started his own Dogbook profile today – what a social networker!

I got very giddy about it all yesterday and suddenly realized in little over a year I’ll be 40! And my poor parents really hoped I’d be over this celebrity obsession thing by age 10!

To be honest, I actually DO feel somewhat smarter and more at peace as an older person. Although I’ve never quite felt “smart.” I surely don’t fall for all the crap I used to fall for as a young turk. I’ve also overcome a slew of fears. But I understand what Cher is saying to this degree: it is a drag when your bodily functions stop running smoothly. What smarts could alleviate that?

Finally, Leach-blog also stated the best-est bit of Cher news of all: “Cher will also be given her own Cher Store at the casino—taking over the former Celine Dion retail space.” I might just pass out! A cute little Cher store! Can I get a job there? Commute from LA?

Last December I was in the Elton John store with my bf and his mom. We stayed at the Paris –  because I just love their public bathrooms. At Caesars’ Elton store, he had scented potpourri pepples for sale. My bf and I showed them to his mom and she exclaimed, “I don’t want to smell Elton John’s rocks!”

I can’t tell you how excited I’m getting. Like when I got the Sonny & Cher stage for my eight birthday and got dizzy. Imagine, a whole store of ridiculous non-sequester Cher merchandise like scented rocks! I remember going crazy in the Barry Manilow store a few years ago: Barry wine. A Barry purse. This is so fucking great! Ahhhhhhhhh!

My mother just put me in my room for some quite time.

Btw, Cher will be a presenter this Sunday on the Grammys. Welcome to follwing Cher in the Tivo century!

 

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