Category: Peripherals (Page 12 of 21)

Cher made some tweet mentions I guess about some recent tabloid un-truths. I know I've seen The Enquirer issue on the stands with an article about how Chaz has gained the weight he lost on both on Celebrity Fit Club and Dancing with the Stars. I don’t know what’s worse, the rumor that Chaz is on the verge of a heart attack or Billy Sammeth’s rumor that Cher hates fat people.

Not to be negative (too late!) but I think it’s hard to change your lifestyle after 40. Chaz has been heavy since young adulthood and like Lindsey Buckingham sings, "you either do or you don’t" or to quote Yoda, "Do or do not…there is no try." It’s endemic of most of America. You can’t single Chaz out.

I was watching the Cooking Channel last week and I saw a commercial aimed at kids for Cuties oranges, followed by a weight loss bar add (with the tag What do you gain when you lose? which I thought was pretty good), followed by an ad equating Lindt’s Chocolates with female sexual pleasure, followed by Jennifer Hudson’s ad for Weight Watchers, followed by another Cuties oranges ad. Now back to the Cooking Channel show that gives us the irresistible urge to cook something fattening. No wonder we’re a food-consuming-confused society.

Full disclosure: I’m 5’7” and I weigh about 157 pounds. So I'm around 15 to 20 pounds overweight in my mind. Not great but not horrible. It’s heredity; my family can eat a ton and not gain too much. And I never put on this extra 20 until I hit 38 years old and my body went all Benedict Arnold on me. But I will say this: food is my addiction. No doubt about it. I think about it all the time. If I let myself, I could be huge.

Honestly, I have been feeling a bit of Chaz-fatigue lately and so I’ve missed all the talk show episodes from Andersen Cooper to Wendy Williams. You can probably find video clips online. Someone on the Yahoo list sent around the Howard Stern transcript: http://www.marksfriggin.com/news11/11-14.htm#tue

Then my friend Dave sent me the news story about Warren Beatty & Annette Bening’s transgendered son Stephen’s remarks calling Chaz out for various crimes against the celebrity transgendered.

Oy! There’s only so much time in the day to devote to Cher and her folk. If it’s a choice between Chaz on talk shows and a big new coffee-table book biography on Cher…well, life is choices.

But I was a bit rejuvenated by the World of Wonder update to Becoming Chaz that aired Sunday: Being Chaz. Although it was sad and scary (and ended on a cliff-hanger situation sure to produce future updates), I felt the one-hour doc actually held together with more drama than the first feature length…but this, of course, was at the expense of its characters. And those are my mixed feelin’s in a nutshell about reality shows. But as I'm already hooked into this drama, I have to two things to say:

1. It's not the fact that Jen drinks that is the main issue in their inability to tie the knot; it's why she drinks. Unless they solve that problem, the relationship will include pain.
2. Scary haters who make death threats scare the hell of me. Billy, don't be a hero.

According to Current TV’s 50 Documentaries You Should See Before You Die, Madonna’s documentary from 1991, aptly titled Truth or Dare, changed the celebrity-PR-game. To compete in show biz, Madonna set a standard that you must expose your day-to-day dramas to your fans, meaning everyone must do a reality show of some sort to maintain interest. Open access. Or simulated open access. Kind of a harsh theory if it’s true. I can only surmise that Cher must have been grandfathered into the old system which is why she can escape such a vulgar fate beyond the occasional phone calls to Chaz on his reality shows.

But seeing some Cher peripherals is always fun: leave it to Heidi to blow the secret of the ring at the dinner party; and I loved seeing Paulette pressuring the troubled couple to set a wedding date.   

So you know there's this conspiracy theory about Sonny's death involving his activities as a US Congressman, specifically his involvement in the Waco hearings. People are still talking about it 13 years after his death, as recently as February 2011.

I myself was just plugging in "Sonny Bono" to my new Direct TV's Smart Search in an effort to finally snag his Charlie's Angeles and Murder She Wrote episodes. His appearance on the documentary Waco: Rules of Engagement showed up on my search list so I taped it, figuring I could see him in the movie asking pithy questions during the totally f-'d-up Waco congressional hearings.

I've been thinking about Sonny lately because a) I just did a Cher zine article on 'Sonny without Cher,' reviewing his movies from the 70s and 80s to which I tacked on highlights from his congressional voting record; and b) I'm reading the new Cher picture-bio You Haven't Seen the Last of Me (and highly enjoying it) and I'm up through the late 70s and with all it's Sonny & Cher drama.

In order to locate Sonny's scene of congressional questionings (which you can easily find on YouTube), I had to watch this whole thing on Waco, a story I've spent over a decade avoiding because I didn't want to have to endure the powder-keg tragedy sparked between a group of extreme Christians (they were decoding the Seventh Seal) and two corrupt government agencies, the ATF and the FBI.

And it was all the horror I dreamt it would be.

I watched it though, getting angrier and angrier, waiting for Sonny's entrance. It was a long slog until he appeared, 2 hours and 35 minutes in (that's the time on my Documentary Channel version anyway, including commercials). After hours of a camera on soul-less government congressional faces, not a trace of emotion and the most headache-inducing comments from Chuck Schumer (who I voted for when I was a citizen of Yonkers, New York in the late 90s) and then the choked-up testimony from one of the few Branch Davidians to escape the inferno (because they had all been gassed to immobility—a fact the FBI admitted), the escapee describes the death-screams of all his friends and you see the first (and only) footage in the movie of a congressman showing any emotion at all. There's real pain in his eyes as he hears about children burning to death. I didn't recognize him until he removes his hand from his face and sure enough, it's Sonny. Not a word he speaks in the whole movie (kind of like Valley Girls). His movie credit comes from these few sections of a reaction-shot of his stricken face.

It's one of the most indelible Sonny images I've ever seen and one I will not soon forget.

For admittedly personal reasons, I'm so glad Chaz's stint on Dancing with the Stars is over.

Because happily I've been having guests visit Santa Fe (my mother-in-law and sister-in-law just came for five days and my parents are due to arrive for ten days) and it's been hard to keep up although my mother-in-law is a fan of the show and we watched it after a trip to Camel Rock Casino…but I couldn't blog about it or vote last week.

Because these competition shoes are emotionally fatiguing…listening to the judges gripe, the dancers gripe, Hope and Nancy Grace gripe, watching Chaz dance with injuries due to the extra weight. I'm sure it must be hard for BOTH Nancy Grace and Chaz (even Ricki Lake says it's hard) to dance with extra weight…so therefore as a viewer you know this weight will set them back. The uncomfortable laws of physics. And the world of dance hates body fat (on men and women).  From my point of view as a woman who is sensitive about her wieight (and was anorexic myself at age 13), making jokes about a man's fat and not a woman's fat is a double edged sword. It's all fun and well for men to be heavy (implicitely acceptable and jolly) but it's a "serious issue" for women and one not to be joked about. This is why I think Ricki and Nancy were encouraged to lose pounds and Chaz was not. Is it really better for women? Is that why ballerinas are anorexic half the time? The issue is worhty of further debate.

Because that last show was rough to watch. Bruno Tonioli called Chas in his tux a "fuzzy penguin" and Chaz got pissed off: his face full of sweat and upset during the rest of the judging session (like he couldn't even hear the other judge's comments) and he was practically speechless during the vote tally, finally expressing his anger at the final sit-down, commenting on the double standard in judging weight between men and women. Which was all irrelevant drama sadly, because Chaz had done what he set out to do by making it into the top six, where arguably David, Ricki, JR and Rob are better dancers. Even Jimmy Kimmel got Chaz admit he didn't expect to win. I love Jimmy Kimmel, btw. So it was time to go, give or take a Nancy Grace.

I've also become addicted to Oprah's Lifeclass over the past two weeks and I wasn't going to mention this here (because everyone has their own opinion about Oprah and I'm new to the Oprah-craze) but Chaz himself tweeted that he'd been watching some of the classes too. And the lessons learned there surely pertain to Chaz's final experience on DWTS, which were unfortunately negative. The dance of 80s week was a triumph of fun and relatively good scores but Broadway week faltered when Chaz took on the character of Phantom of the Opera. The mask only obscured his charisma and his footwork wasn't to the level of the other contestants. Dancer Max was mean about it but he did speak the truth when he alluded to Chaz as he complained that Hope had been over-judged on technique and footwork when other contestants had been basically walking around the floor and getting a A for effort. Now I've been asking the voting-Gods to send Hope home for weeks now because of her inability to deal with not being number one, but that doesn't get Chaz off the hook for his sub-par dancing.

Oprah Lifelessons come to play here. Let's consider dancing itself. Chaz, do you really want to be a dancer? Seriously? Is this who you are? I thought the point of coming on this show was not only, as you said in your farewell, to show the world a different kind of man BUT to show the world that America's DWTS-voters would not reject a transexual man in week one…in week two…in week three…in week four…in week five. What a f*#king accomplishment! I so wished it could have been celebrated as such last night. Authentically you did above and beyond what you needed to do to that bum knee. Did the ego take over?

Remember Oprah's ego lesson. What are hurt feelings? You letting the ego take over. Why go on a competition show when you're feeling more confident than you ever have in your life? Why go on a show whose judges will eventually shred you for your looks, your weight or your dancing? Why put yourself out there for that inevitability? What was your true intention? I believed it was that your soul had a purpose that went beyond weight and dancing ability. The judges will say what they will say. It's their show (and Max's). But it's not their life to judge. And their comments are worthless at the feet of it. The first Oprah Lifeclass (and all of them, quite frankly) was transforming to me because I get my feelings hurt all the time. Was it Iyanla Vansant who said people's comments are just observations? Only you give them meaning.

By the way, the judges never said (or implied to my understanding of their comments) that you are a fat troll. Your own ego spoke those words. And that's the important judge.

Do judges comments affect votes? Maybe so. They gave very positive comments to Chaz for many weeks in spite of some okay-to-bad dancing and maybe that too affected voting. But unfortunatley it isn't about America's votes in the end (which is tragic because they kept a trans man in the show for six weeks) but about feelings and ego and weight loss.

John and I talked a lot about this last night. I wondered if the judges where confused about how to treat a trans man. John feels that Chaz getting angry over Bruno's comment did not make Chaz look good on national TV (it made him look like a sore loser) BUT it was a natural healthy male response.  John loved seeing a confident Chaz on the show but felt it was time for him to essentially "man-up" and admit he had gone as far in the competition as he was meant to go.

What's going on here has so much more to do with weight, dancing, gender and charisma. It's all mashed up together. Chaz is going through learning to live as a man and wanting to be treated as a man. And this is harsh but none of that is a dance-judge's problem. I don't care if the judges are assholes. This is Chaz's singular journey not theirs. And "feeling good about yourself" for any reason should never have been the goal of competing on a TV dance show.

John also commented that this show is harder for men because they must look like they are leading the dance. A good male dancer can make any woman look good because he can lead her around. It's harder for a talented woman dancer to make a man look good. John also said we all need to rewatch Oprah's show on the ego.

Bottom line: Chaz outlasted most of the show's hotties and I wish I wasn't so sad about the final week's drama. Carson Kressley left with ego-affirming grace last week. And he was a gawky, bad dancer. There's absolutly no shame in that.

Before there was this blog, I used to post Reality TV commentary on Ape Culture. We called it Celebrity Zoo. This is where we did the week-by-week commentary of Chaz when he was Chastity on Celebrity Fit Club season 3:

http://www.apeculture.com/television/celebfit3ep1.htm
 
Check it out if you want a ride down memory lane. That was almost nine years ago!!
 
Look at those sconces. Did they film this show in Cher's house?

The introduction of the cast shows there are an inordinate amount of blondes on this show. And the music, is that a recycled Oscar theme from the 80s?

This week Chaz's performance was too slow for the quick step; but I loved the ripped-off version of Joan Jett's version of the Mary Tyler Moore Show theme. This is a version I wanted to play at my wedding but I nixed it because I felt it was too self-referential. It was my wedding and all but I didn’t want it be all about me, you know.

The judges remarked on Chaz's likeability, calling him a little ewok even. They also remarked on Chaz's "circumstances," those being the bad knee and ankle but also noted that this is the "territory of this show" and that "charm takes you so far." Chaz needs to stop complaining about his age, weight and blown-out-knees (probably due to carrying around too much weight all these years) UNLESS the strategy is to get votes out of sympathy pleas. Chaz already looks thinner by the way.

His scores were 6,5,6 but since all scores skewed higher this week, he ended up at the absolute bottom. In audience votes, Chaz ended up in the bottom three with David Arquette and Elisabetta Canalis (who was too stiff and lost votes probably from her scenes of bitchiness). George Clooney arm-candy ended up going. I'm glad because I'm starting to feel like Arquette has deep-down self-confidence issues.

As for the others, Chynna Phillips is very good and graceful and is helping me get that short-haired pixie from the 90s out of my head. I keep seeing her former bandmate Carnie Wilson on Celebrity Ghost Stories and Celebrity Dreams Decoded. She's looking tired out. Ricki Lake is beautiful and showed great legs this week. I think I have a girl crush on her. Carson Kressley continues to be fun. Nancy Grace. Now I noticed lots of people not clapping for her so I read up on all her scandals. Ick. J.R. Martinez is so so good. Rob Kardashian was last week's lowest score and I'm agnostic about him this week. Hope Solo is still doing soccer events so it's amazing she's hanging in there. Kristin Cavallari—I still don’t dislike this gal yet.

Another transgendered individual called into Stephanie Miller's radio show this week and said Chaz was great, down to earth, and they couldn’t have asked for a better advocate.

There's a rumor circulating that Chaz is being courted to host Saturday Night Live with Cher as a musical guest (good time to push that new single). Oh wouldn't that be sweet. It's the closest we'd ever get to a Sonny & Cher variety show reunion, kids. Absolutely dreamy.