a division of the Chersonian Institute

Category: Television (Page 22 of 22)

A Week in Cher-time

The Latest News Clips
(as posted on Cher groups)

Honestly, a good source for the latest Cher clips is always Cherworld.com. It’s an amazing Cher site that fishes out the late-breaking Cher news so you don’t have to. Cherworld’s on it!

Chermoths_3 Items covered in latest interviews

• Farah Fawcett’s cancer treatments with embalization and cyber knives
• Dangerous pug-faced paparazzi
• Cher’s good genes
• Cher’s good ex-boyfriend Gene
• Sonny ghost
• Cher’s Elvis teen crush (and she still didn’t go to Vegas with him?? Imagine if your teen crush invited you to Vegas for the weekend. Tell me, who is it? Would you go? I just got over my teen crush…last month. So no, I guess I wouldn’t go now.)
• Cher’s good health habits with the succinct quote: “I never saw drugs do anything good for anyone.”
• Her other tips for longevity including love well…and often.

So, it irks me that latest press reports state Cher is set to record her 27th album (one source even said 25th). Not to be a Cher nerd (too late), but It’s only 25 when you only count studio solo albums. But why leave out Sonny & Cher, Allman and Woman, Black Rose and the live albums? It’s so much more impressive to say she’s starting to record her 36th album (which includes the three major live albums and the Good Times soundtrack album –with all its original material– but not Chastity because it was mostly instrumental.)

It’s all about me

And this Cher nerd is feeling a little wiped-out and overwhelmed at the moment. Basically too much going on right now and I need to simply simplify. Helping my parents with their reunion/50th Anniversary party this summer, planning for my trip to Paris with the bf (which includes brushing up on my French, planning our itinerary and buying suitable non-American looking clothes so I wont be ostracized as a tourist), working on a somewhat large poetry project, and studying Spanish, Information Architecture (and now Project Management) for work.

I’ve had to put off my second class in ceramics for the time being. Which smarts.

At least Valentines Day is a hurdle that has passed. My bf and I have really sorry luck on romantic holidays including anniversaries. This year traffic made my bf late and our restaurant had some crisis and couldn’t seat anybody. After hearing angry comments from other couple’s left waiting in the lobby for 40 minutes, we left and went to a Mexican dive (my favorite, Rosa’s, on PCH). But overall, better than some fiascoes of years past. This year I got my bf a slew of chocolates and a singing Johnny Cash card. I also bought a singing Sonny & Cher card for myself. They were $4.99 each. The S&C card said:

“You got the honey,
I got the bees.
You got the mac,
And I got the cheese.
You got the hand,
I got the glove.
But the best part of all is…

Inside: we got the love.”

And then the card played:

“I got you to kiss goodnight
I got you to hold me tight
I got you and I wont let go
I got you to love me so
I got….you babe.”

Really loud. Honestly, it was lame. I guess it’s important to have it for historical purposes. To document the crap our Hallmark society puts out. I hope the estate of Sonny Bono received a good chuck of that $4.99.

Grammys: What are you wearing?

For more information on Cher’s outfit last week at the Grammys, visit Julia Gerard who designed Cher’s fitted skirt. J. Gerard holds shop on Melrose Avenue in West Hollywood. My obsession with the show Project Runway makes me wonder if Cher would like Jeffrey Sebelia from last year.

The new show

In the Feb 10 edition of the La Times there was a full-page ad that said:

Cher
opening may 2008
The Coliseum
Caesars Palace
Las Vegas

Barry1 I almost got excited until I noticed it was in the same Cher font as used for the Farewell tour and Living Proof. This goth font has been used for so many years it’s becoming like that Barry Manilow font he on all his albums from the first one in 1972 to the Even Now album in 1978. It was a butt-ugly font, too. Cher’s font is not butt-ugly but it does make me worry that the Vegas show will recycle things. I saw the Farewell show about…um….5 times. Which seems like a lot but in Willie Wonka terms is like that scene when Charlie was in class and asked by his teacher how many Wonka bars he had Barry2_2 Barry2_3 bought hoping for a golden ticket and all the other kids were like “you only bought two? How insane is that?” and Charlie felt like a dolt. Well, that equates to how I feel when I tell other Cher fans I only saw 5 or so farewell tour shows. But believe me, five was enough. Nothing changed except an incredibly shrinking set list.

All I am saying is that I yearn for new font assets. It’s not that I hate these goth assets. They’re strong and ballsy and look like they’ve been around for centuries. What’s not to like?Barry3_2

This all may sound crabby but I’m really looking forward to this year’s show. I hope to see lots of stupidly large headdresses. Headdresses like in Celebration at Caesars – so big Cher could only make it down a few steps before cute male dancers are forced to come to her aid.

And is Cher at the Coliseum really the official title of the show? Not quite the pizazz of The Showgirl Barry4 Must Go On or the simple artistry of The Red Piano.

 

Lots of new news clips to watch

Accesswig 

   

   

    

    

   

Access Hollywood

http://video.accesshollywood.com/player/?id=215877

http://www.accesshollywood.com/article/8327/Cher:-Farrah-Fawcett-Is-Cancer-Free/   

  Etwig

   

   

   

   

   

Entertainment Tonight
http://www.cherworld.com/news/?p=462

Extraglasses_2

   

   

   

   

   

   

Extra

http://extratv.warnerbros.com/2008/02/cher_gene_simmons.php

http://extratv.warnerbros.com/2008/02/cher_gives_us_her_three_tips_t.php

   

Steve Martin: Born Standing Up

Martin (Jan 24, 2008, at The Wilshire Theater Beverly Hills)

Imagine my glee finding Steve Martin’s latest book, Born Standing Up: A Comic’s Life, sitting in a stack at a Santa Monica bookstore and discovering that it was not another piece of fiction but a biography about his long-lost life as a stand-up comedian. And here I’ve been kvetching so much about his abandonment of the art form for more well-heeled work in academic theatricals intermingled with big-budget, saccharine movie turds. (I’ll take fifty Lonely Guys any day if we can just forget that movie with Queen Latifa ever happened.

My brothers and father would re-tell scenes of The Jerk at the dinner table. I knew the entire “he hates cans!” routine before I ever watched the movie like I knew “it’s only a flesh wound” years before watching Monty Python’s Holy Grail). My brother also had the King Tut Martin Steve Martin album which we both loved (the embezzling cat story, the France bits). However, my admiration of Martin didn’t survive past the movie Roxanne, which was so sweet it hurt my teeth. And his appearances on SNL and talk shows struck me as cold. Then he did that great Oscar hosting job and I was back yearning for his old days of stand up. Then the bad movies with too many weddings and kids and Goldie Hawn romances happened and I was put off again.

Let me tell you, Martin’s new book did wonders for showing a much warmer human being. And it’s a recommended read for his insight into how a comedy act is assembled, structured and crafted over years of sweat and experimentation, also delving into what it feels like on the other side of 40-thousand fans who know your routines by heart.

Good enough. But then it was announced that Steve Martin would be talking with Carol Burnett at a special event in LA at hosted by the group Writers Bloc. I was in heaven!

The theater was huge; the event was sold out so we had to sit in the balcony where I was too far away to ask my big Steve Martin question at the Q&A, which was: As a writing team for The Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour, why didn’t more of Bob Einstein and Steve Martin’s early-70s brilliances end up on the show? Sonny & Cher’s show is now remembered as an amazing variety show…but not for its comedy. It’s loved for its eclectic guest roster, Bob Mackie costumes and torch musical numbers.
Even the opening monologue (the only comedic bit every discussed today) mostly succeeded on S&C chemistry.

Cher’s deadpan delivery is much-ballyhooed and somewhat interesting in a nightclub setting but not brilliant by any stretch of TV variety rubrics. In fact, her deadpan serves her music more effectively, which I talk about in my Cher Zine Vol. 2.

And Martin was working on some cutting-edge material at the time; his own act was about to explode. Bob Einstein was already doing Super Dave Osbourne on The John Byner Show.  I just don’t get it. What the heck happened? Did Martin and Bob hesitate to even share the more progressive comedy pieces or did they hoard their best stuff? Did producers Chris Bearde and Alan Blye or even Sonny Bono veto the more risky ideas? The Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour could have been so much better. Or maybe Martin would have been more successful working across the hallway of CBS Studio City writing for The Carol Burnett Show.

Who’s to blame? I want names.

Asked what bits Martin did for The Smothers Bros Show (one of Martin’s writing gigs before S&C), he joked that “all the best stuff you remember…I wrote that.” But alas, for the S&C show there was no best stuff. The comedy was weak and I can barely generate a chuckle or two watching it today. Carol Burnett routines are still interesting and often funny. But Steve Martin’s late 70s stand-up material as found on his records and movies like The Jerk – holds up admirably. It’s the definition of lost opportunity in my little book.

I imagine it was a difference in comedic taste between Martin and Sonny and others on the show. Because Martin never waxes happily about his experiences working on their show and mentions it rarely as even a career footnote. In fact, it’s the show that inspired the end of his television writing career. In his book, he only mentions the show with one anecdote and not a very positive one. He describes being approached by Sonny and his friend, manager, business partner Denis Pregnolato. They met with Martin one day to express an interest in developing a show entirely around him.

Which is an interesting idea because it hearkens back to Sonny’s phase of mega-media mogulship and also makes you wonder why he never did launch any other major show business project that didn’t involve Cher.

The sad thing was that Martin was excited about the idea and Sonny and Denis never brought it up again. At the end of the anecdote I wasn’t sure if Martin’s point was that Sonny and Dennis were hair-brained and couldn’t get ‘er done or that they were never really serious about the venture in the first place.

At one point, Burnett explained how she wanted to share good comedic material with her co-stars and second-bananas Vicki Lawrence and Harvey Korman. She learned this on The Gary Moore Show, that spreading the laughs made the show stronger, hoarding them made the show weaker. This also reflects negatively on the Sonny & Cher shows where bit players like Teri Garr got not even bare scraps for punch lines. Garr mostly did non-stop set-up work as Olivia in the Laverne sketches. Once in a great moon Ted Zeigler would over-mug a joke but that’s about it.

The closest Burnett  got to mentioning The Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour, an immensely popular variety series at the time Martin and Burnett were working at CBS, was when Burnett rhapsodized about how much fun they were all having with all the variety shows in full swing in the CBS building. Martin only added a story about a nutty comedian he would always overhear in the bathroom.

As far as Cher connections, Martin also mentioned meeting Frank Oz on his Muppet Show appearances (Martin was on the TV show with Carol Burnett and in the inaugural Muppet Movie) and forming a life-long professional relationship with Oz who went on to direct some of Martin’s movies. Interestingly, Cher didn’t get along with Frank Oz on the set of Mermaids where there were rumors that Cher actually had Oz fired somehow. In any case, Oz left in anger and went on to direct What About Bob. Now although Frank Oz doesn’t sound like a great Muppet-of-fun-joy to me either, I have to be honest here, What About Bob was a funnier movie.

There was on irritating aspect of this “conversation” between Burnett and Martin and it was Carol Burnett. Press lead us to believe this would be talk about Martin’s new book. Burnett however seemed disinterested in interviewing Martin at best, dead set against asking any questions at worst, letting dead silence hang in the air instead of doing any work. She asked him probably a total of two questions, both lame. One question was who his favorite movie star was. This turned into an excuse for her to segue, with neck-breaking speed, into an anecdote about that particular movie star, Cary Grant and how Grant loved her show. Frankly, she seemed only motivated to tell Carol Burnett Show anecdotes about herself.

Her other question to Martin was about how he started out as a TV writer which only betrayed the fact that she hadn’t read the book or even done a quick IMDB or Wikipedia search for a brief timeline on his career.

To Martin’s credit, he made gentlemanly (as in gentle) attempts to keep the conversation going, respectfully taking the piss out of Burnett’s strange reluctance to engage in any real “conversation” about comedy. At one point Martin joked, “I DARE you to ask me a question.” She never really did.

And it pains me to complain about Burnett because she is one of my comedic idols along with Steve Martin and Harvey Korman. I believe The Carol Burnett Show was one of the three most influential comedies of the 70s (along with The Mary Tyler Moore Show and All in the Family) and a landmark moment for women in comedy and a variety show of superior quality. And she deserves to be knighted for that. But the truth is, she hasn’t done anything worthy of knighthood since then (although I loved her in Annie and The Four Seasons).

And I’ve heard all the Carol Burnett anecdotes many times, have taped all the reunion specials, read her autobiography (One More Time) her biography (Laughing Till It Hurts by J. Randy Taraborrelli).

Steve Martin has been far less available for public introspections of this kind. It would have garnished Burnett extra kudos for showing some interest in this comedic trailblazer she was sitting next to.
Instead she came off as Hollywood, as a self-absorbed scene-stealer. And too make matters worse, her anecdotes took too long to perform. She sunk too many details into each story, making sure we knew the name of every person in the business she ever worked with or talked to. I kept thinking “can we get back to Steve please?”

On the other hand, Martin was accessible and pleasant with the fan Q&As and showed true affection for Burnett. I wished he would have showed more interest in contemporary comedians, however, when asked for his favorites. His disinterest in even knowing the names of his most recent famous co-workers felt a little isolationist.

But I’ve come a far ways if that’s the worst thing I could say about Steve Martin. His book went a long way to showing a person with flesh and feelings, portraying a modest, thankful kid from Orange County after years of seeming affected and quietly arrogant.

View photos of the event.

      

S&C on Hullabaloo and The Beat Club

Morosecher Whoops…I was wrong about the Sammy Davis Jr. medley last week when I was talking about Shindig. The Sammy Davis Jr. medley was from Hullabaloo and it was a Beatles medley. I blame my incomprehensible note-taking last December for the error. On Hullabaloo S&C join in the medley with "I Cant Get No Satisfaction" which just sounds silly. Later they join Sammy in singing "I’m Henry VIII I Am."

They also sing "I Got You Babe" live, Cher in one of her Good Times top and dancing with insane jerky movements.

My favorite of all of these 60s TV appearances has to be from The Beat Club. It’s so European! Cher is Morosecher2 in a long-sleeved turtleneck. They sing "And Then He Kissed Me." The camera does a closeup of Cher’s moccasins and pans the small audience and I think kids today – err, yesterday! Sonny and Cher say something like "Danka" when they finish singing. This must be a German show. Those must be German youths. And are those bad German teeth?

Cher sings alone on "I Feel Something in the Air" – her head down like a morose teen. This is a very raw Cher performance. You know how the song (written by Sonny) turns in the middle? A sudden girl group song appears, then it’s a downer again with vague references to pregnancy, so vague as a poem it wouldn’t make it through an MFA workshop. I’m sure the kids were confused by it all but maybe not seeing as they were Germans. I like the crazy moodiness of the song and Cher is good at looking teen tragic. Sonny pops back in wearing stripes! Then the video cuts off as if Sonny’s outfit has caused apocalypse.

Sonnysuit

   

Sonny & Cher on Shindig

737973_356x237_2 Have Sonny & Cher ever played with the Stones?

Hell yeah!

This is my second installment on the fabulous 60s TV appearance DVD I received from a stranger in the mail after an eBay purchase: this is The Shindig Episodes.

On one episode we find S&C, Bobby Sherman, The Rolling Stones and lot of other peeps I didn’t know. First of all, Cher was in a jumper. A jumper! Sonny in a suit. They do a medley, a crazy jam…with the cast and The ROLLING STONES! Shindig_3

Totally happening! Super groovy!

Could this host, Jimmy O’Neill, (right) be any more dapper?

S&C don new outfits where they sing “We’re Gonna Make It,” a clip that has been making the rounds of email and Cher list postings over the last two years; I reviewed this clip back in November – the highlights:

Here’s a clip of Sonny & Cher singing "We’re Gonna Make It." Wow! First of all, didn’t we associate that song with the Allman and Woman album. Sonny & Cher did it too? Just like "You Really Got a Hold on Me." Was Cher trying to recreate Sonny & Cher with Allman duets? It seems so beyond comprehension…or did Sonny & Cher cover so many friggin songs it would be impossible not to re-cover her covers? …it would be hard to top this version. Bobby Sherman, that ridiculous dance, the screaming kids, the sudden appearance and disappearance of backup singers (if it wasn’t the 60s I’d think they were CGI’d in there), Sonny going absolutely crazy at the end. Wow!

The clip has since been taken off YouTube. (sad face) Find it…it’s unlike any other S&C clip I’ve ever seen. Back in November, fellow Cher Scholar, Robrt Pela of the Arizona New Times among other things wrote to say:

I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW THIS CLIP COULD POSSIBLY EXIST.

I mean, this looks way early, circa "Look at Us," and it just doesn’t make sense that they would use crucial TV time at that point to do a song that a) they hadn’t recorded and b) therefore weren’t promoting.

How is this clip POSSIBLE?

This DVD brought me the answer to that very important and mysterious question: why indeed were Sonny & Cher wasting valuable airtime to scat? And Robrt was very astute to recognize the clip as a promotion for their first album. I look at all these 60s videos and get confused. Unless i see her bangs starting to grow out (see top pic) and only then I can identify it as late-decade.

Anyway, this was filler material for "I Got You Babe" promotion.  S&C do "IGUB" later in the show…with props. Cher is in one of her Good Times outfits, the ruffle-covered bell bottom outfit from "Trust Me" where she skips around LA. Interestingly, this Shindig performance of "IGUB" is excruciatingly shortened and you don’t see Cher’s face for much of it.

Sonny then sings "Laugh At Me." At first I thought it was his usual bad lip-syncing but then I realized he was trying to sing over the record! (Cher Scholar shakes head)

In another Shindig episode, S&C star with Aretha Franklin, Marianne Faithful and The Kinks. I don’t remember any groovy American-Idol style medley but I do remember Sammy Davis Jr. making maudlin over current hits. Marianne looks completely uncomfortable and bored. S&C sing "It’s Gonna Rain" and Cher sings "Dream Baby" – both are sung live. I’m surprised how often "Dream Baby" was promoted on Shindig and Shivaree.

In the next segment Sonny dresses like Caesar and Cher like Cleo. I couldn’t place the song for the life of me but Cher looks great in her dress and they’ve got ‘a look’ even with her stringy hair and their big noses. It’s fun to see Sonny make her laugh.

Then the host, Sammy Davis Jr., introduces the pick of the week, "IGUB," calling it a masterpiece and outa sight. Cher wears her union-jack-fit. Why does Sonny shake his head like that when he sings. Cher has an epileptic moment at the end and then PDA. Eewwww!

To cleanse yourself, you may want to look for Cher in this long ABBA retrospective video: Terishivaree_2 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gz_1g9kwBUM

Although Shindig Cher clips are not available at the moment on YouTube, here is a hilarious Rollings Stones clip from around that time: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXb5UL0dwLc

And before I was mentioning Teri Garr was a dancer on Shindig and Shivaree. Here’s a pic (I think she’s on the far right).

   

Sonny & Cher on Shivaree

Chershivaree_2 I purchased an item on eBay late last year and as a very special gift (RONCO anyone?) I received a DVD of old 60s Sonny & Cher appearances on shows like Shindig and Shivaree. Was I in heaven?! I kept looking for Teri Garr go-go dancing in the background (as she worked on these shows as a dancer between 1964-1966). I still think it is odd that Garr worked for years for Sonny & Cher in the 70s and never once mentioned running into them on those 60s shows. Because it seems like they made a ton of appearances there.

I’ll just start with the Shivaree episodes this week which were grainy on my DVD copy but wonderful to see nonetheless, amazingly raw. (The dancers are pitiful on this show, by the way.)

I watched two episodes with Sonny & Cher, one where they sat back-to-back singing “Just You” and then stood on a balcony full of dancing teens to sing “Sing C’est La Vie.” Cher wore a very conservative shirt, similar to what she wore on the album cover of Look At Us. Which is, quite frankly, a bizarre thing to see — Cher in a normal teen piece of clothing. Nothing hippie-like or scandalous about that green t-shirt.

Cher also sang “Dream Baby” solo on one show (in some funky, skin-tight paisley pants) and “All I Really Want to Do” with some equally funky Cher-style dance moves. She seems very shy and young in these clips but does fine without Sonny. At the end of the Cher-solo episode it’s fun to watch the credits where you can see Cher dancing in a crowd of guests — in what looks like the last moves of anonymous carefree-ness she would ever make. So un-self conscious.

Watch the YouTubes:

Sonny & Cher doing “Just You”

Cher doing “Dream Baby”

Cher doing “All I Really Want to Do"

I can’t find the Shivaree credit clips or the "Sing C’est La Vie" clip which is too bad because it’s ridiculous when the MC camps as a Frenchman. By the way, when I was first chatting with my bf almost three years ago on match.com, I found out he was a former Proust scholar. We hadn’t met yet mind you and he was such a effortless and enthusiastic emailer. I thought he was gay. Heterosexual men write really dull emails IMHO. Anyway, I told him Sonny & Cher were once really into the French. And he said he had, coincidentally, just borrowed a copy of Sonny & Cher’s greatest hits at the library and he was very bemused by the song "Sing C’est La Vie." I found copies of it all over the YouTubes:

Sing Cest La Vie the video!

On Barbara McNair

On Mike Douglas 1969
     

Sadness and How It Makes Me Soft on Elijah Blue

Littleman_2 I’ve been steeped in sadness this last week over my move and sudden unexpected (and profoundly disappointing) interpersonal dysfunctions in relation to said move. I’ve been watching YouTube Cher videos to cheer up.

First , S&C singing Little Man – look at those hilarious earrings: are they fuzzy dice? I love how intimate S&C seem in this video, how even then Sonny is trying to fix Cher’s hair, his wacky suit and how in love and in sync they seem at this moment in time.

Cher sings Fire in Monte Carlo – I truly love how that dress moves.Montecarlo

Sonny & Cher Mike Douglas Interview from early 70s

Part 1; Part 2 and Part 3

Watch what a bad job Sonny does lip syncing and his follow-up comments about being a better producer/writer than a singer – which is remarkably different from the interview he did as Cher’s guest on The Mike Douglas show in late 70s where they tell him he should continue producing and he says he wants to perform. I think he must have missed all the spot-light rigmarole and hullabaloo.

Hairswing Next S&C sing The Beat Goes On – oh those hilariously animated French people. I love Cher’s hair swinging around in this one and her crazy hippie dancing.

 

 

 

Insane Cher wig alert! Cher is such a better lip sync-er than sonny.Wig_2

 

 

 

To prove what a sad state I’m in, I actually enjoyed this Elijah interview from earlier this year. I chalk it up to not being in my right mind. It still irks me that Elijah can’t give Cher artistic cred. I know its hard in comparison to his Dad (who has built-in-coolness) but it would be so truly antagonistic (since it’s his job to be an antagonist – which is an interesting idea) to give his mom some props beyond pop lite throw-off compliments.  Undercore is an interesting term, the constantly moving edge. I’m not sure I can connect it yet to what I’ve seen from Deadsy and I’m still uncomfortable with his critiques of women’s value and intelligence as he has not yet proven himself to be brilliant.

Here he is on Howard Stern late last year. I actually like Howard’s show, exactly because it takes the piss out of celebrity interviews and inverts the power structures of those interviews. We see Elijah shares the Cher trait of abbreviating names needlessly. Paris becomes Pare. It was also interesting (in a kind of icy way) hearing Elijah describe living in a Cher house, where there could be 50 people roaming around and you wouldn’t see anyone for days. That’s so fucking depressing. (I think that’s my moving stress talking). Elijah had good words for Cher’s boyfriends: Rob, Gene and Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise? I thought that was just a rumor. I feel all like Mrs. Spencer Tracy now. “Katharine Hepburn: I thought you were just a rumor.” Snap.
   

TV Land Greatest TV Icons

Cherbodies I’m gonna be sporadic with my blog postings in December. Which sucks because I have LOTS to talk about, a veritable backlog of Cher-chat to share. People have been sending me really good Cher stuff I must say: a critical USC analysis of the Bono marriage marketing plan and a DVD full of 60s S&C performances to discuss. But life happens. My ceramics class is ending (much to do) and I just found out I’ll need to move this month (due to rehabbing that will be done to our apartment building), plus I have company in town this weekend and Christmas on the horizon. But stay tuned.

Today I just want to say how disgusted I am with Entertainment Weekly and TV Land’s list of 100 Greatest TV Icons. The list is breathtakingly disorganized and illogical and Cher is ridiculously low in its rankings. At  the turn of the millennium, Cher ended up on many best-of entertainment lists. I felt her rankings were usually fair – even if they weren’t top 30. The fact that she made a music list here or there at all was a good sign of things to come. But on the television list, Cher should have been ranked much higher, in the top 50 at least. Entertainment Weekly and TV Land didn’t even bother to discuss the bottom 50 in the magazine or TV special. So annoying.

Here’s the list. I’m fine with the top ten but I’ve noted rankings that warranted extra comment.

100. Marcia Cross
99. Delta Burke
98. Meredith Baxter
97. In Living Color cast
96. Shannen Doherty – give me a break
95. Richard Dawson
94. Melissa Gilbert
93. Neil Patrick Harris – come ON
92. Judge Judy
91. Dennis Franz
90. John Stamos – why is he even on this list?
89. Robert Guillaume
88. Gavin MacLeod
87. Phil Hartman
86. Jerry Mathers
85. Rod Serling
84. Cartman from "South Park"
83. Isabel Sanford
82. Ted Knight
81. Dick Cavett
80. Adam West
79. Angela Landsbury
78. Art Carney
77. James Garner
76. Candice Bergen
75. Peter Falk
74. Joan Rivers
73. Tony Danza
72. Cher – travesty of justice
71. Rosie O’Donnell – sure she’s making a stir now but I predict she will not have such long-term impact. She is not in the league of Phil Donahue or Oprah and The View fiasco will soon be just a Hollywood footnote.
70. Bob Denver  – Gilligan maybe; Bob no.
69. Barbara Eden – Genie maybe
68. Don Cornelius
67. Tom Selleck
66. Kelsey Grammer – great sitcom actor among other great sitcom actors. He shouldn’t be higher than Ted Knight.
65. Pamela Anderson – you’re kidding me with this
64. Phil Donahue
63. Ed Asner – an no Chloris Leachman??
62. Redd Foxx
61. Pee Wee Herman – should be toward the bottom of the list
60. Merv Griffin
59. Ted Danson – see Kelsy Grammer
58. Don Knotts
57. Charlie Brown
56. Betty White – and no Chloris Leachman??
55. Fred Rogers – should be way higher
54. Florence Henderson
53. Ed McMahon – if he’s here, Jerry Lewis should be here and who wants that?
52. Ron Howard – Opie maybe
51. Bob Hope
50. Larry Hagman – see Kelsey Grammer
49. Calista Flockhart – I bang my head against my keyboard on this one
48. Jimmy Smits – this list is totally un-credible now
47. Simon Cowell
46. Lassie
45. Sarah Michelle Gellar – 90s star; wont last another 10 years I predict
44. Susan Lucci
43. Flip Wilson
42. James Gandolfini – his longevity is possible but remains to be seen
41. Jon Stewart
40. Sally Field
39. Jennifer Aniston – see Kelsey Grammer
38. Bea Arthur – see Kelsey Grammer
37. George Clooney – for Facts of Life???
36. Diahann Carroll
35. Michael J. Fox
34. Bob Barker
33. Ellen DeGeneres – fascinating but no icon yet she isn’t
32. Henry Winkler
31. Sarah Jessica Parker – see Kelsey Grammer
30. Alan Alda
29. John Ritter – I always liked John Ritter but I’m amazed he made it this high…could barely get a good gig while he was alive
28. Howard Cosell
27. Regis Philbin
26. Farrah Fawcett
25. Heather Locklear
24. Michael Landon
23. Barbara Walters
22. Milton Berle
21. Kermit 
20. Carroll O’Connor
19. Andy Griffith
18. William Shatner
17. Bob Newhart
16. David Letterman
15. "Not Ready for Primetime Players" – have sucked longer than they rocked
14. Ed Sullivan
13. Jackie Gleason
12. Dick Van Dyke
10. Dick Clark
9. Homer Simpson
8. Jerry Seinfeld
7. Mary Tyler Moore
6. Carol Burnett
5. Walter Cronkite
4. Bill Cosby – love and respect his comedy albums (didn’t hate the Cosby Show but shouldn’t be so high for his 2 television shows; stand-up maybe; if this list is trying to be affirmative action, he still should be higher than Flip Wilson. I’m willing to discuss this one though; did he pave the way for more African American programming? Or did he just end up sending them all to the WB?
3. Oprah Winfrey
2. Lucille Ball
1. Johnny Carson

So that’s the atrocious list. Here is a sketch of my alternate rankings

1. Johnny Carson – dork but okay – he’s Mr. Television
2. Lucy  – and Desi – stupid to leave off Desi when many of the I Love Lucy conventions were his ideas
3. Oprah – has virtual control over our souls
4. Phil Donahue – father of the talk show
5. Walter Cronkite
6. Carol O’ Connor – redefined acceptable sitcom characters
7. Ed Sullivan – father of variety
8. Kermit – symbol of children’s television programming
9. Milton Berle – – hate him but he’s a TV pioneer
10. Barbara Walters – ick but you think of woman reporter on TV and there she is
11. Homer – longest running television show
12. Jackie Gleason – helped define TV sitcoms
13. Dick Clark – helped define half-hour music programming
14. Bob Barker – the face of game shows
15. Howard Cosell – the face of sports

Basically, the top 20 should be for the ultimate TV pioneers or those who symbolize a genre of television.

The 20-30 range should be for landmark shows: Roseanne, Mary Tyler Moore, Carol Burnett, Dick Van Dyke represent the classic show.

The 30-40 range can be reserved for celebrities who were iconic style figures, people who influenced fashion or TV style for a goodly time. Cher would fall toward the top of this range; Farrah to the bottom (as she was just a poster of good hair when all is said and done). I feel Cher conquered 70s television and for that she deserves to be ranked near Flip Wilson. I’d put her in the top 30 for sure. No kid in the 70s wasn’t enamored by Cher on TV at some point in the 70s: budding feminists, the toddler gay community, and aspiring baby divas.

Workhorses who excelled in more than one show should appear in the 50-75 range: Ted Danson, Heather Locklear, Ed Asner.

Odds and ends who we somehow love but really didn’t display much discernible talent should fall in the 75-90 range: Ron Howard as Opie, Bob Denver as Gilligan.

Late breaking favorites should be relegated to the bottom because they may have promise but they haven’t exhibited longevity yet: James Gandolfini, Rosie O’Donnell. Ellen DeGeneres

Please, send me your thoughts.

   

Thanksgiving Couture

Turkeylamp I’m watching TV Lands Greatest TV Icons tonight to start off my very exciting Dead Turkey Day plans for the weekend. For some odd reason, my bf and I our unseasonably festive this year and have decided to decorate our digs this weekend, bake cookies and generally be cheery. This is most unusual.

To keep you busy over the weekend if your family is tormenting you with discussions of embarrassing childhood moments involving Thanksgiving leftovers of yore, retreat to your room and play with Eddie Kent’s 60s Cher paper dolls. You can play with them online!

Turkeysc_2 I couldn’t find a particularly Thanksgiving Cher photo but here is a video of S&C singing in Thanksgiving colors: Just imagine them coming over to your dinner party dressed like that with some giblets and boxed wine.

Anyway, happy Thanksgiving – adopt a turkey next year: http://www.adoptaturkey.org/.
   

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