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Cher and The Ugly Duckling

Uglyduck
For those who don’t know, Cher narrated a children’s classic on cassette tape in the early 1990s. When I was a little rugrat I LOVED books on tape so it’s a small crime of happenstance that I didn’t have this waybackwhen. I would have worn the tape ribbon to shreds. This is none other than the famous Hans Christian Anderson story, The Ugly Duckling about an ugo duck who grows up to be a swan (you see? that's why he was ugo? he was swan among ducks…he was just different and had to grow up to find his peoples.

This blog talks about her performance:

Cher's rich contralto voice tells the tale of The Ugly Duckling with dignity and grace. Serving as narrator, and also providing voices of numerous characters, it was clear that each voice was developed and purposeful. I found the older voices she performed to be entertaining and most colorful. You could keenly feel the sorrow of the bewildered water foul. Cher did very well conveying his fellow creatures' bitterness as cold comfort in the midst of unfavorable circumstances. ..Cher narrates over some exquisitely beautiful music performed by Celtic harp player and spoken word artist, Patrick Ball…”

Who doesn’t love The Ugly Duckling story right? Cher, as well as some others of us out there, probably feel we can identify with it. I, myself, feel as if I have failed to fully swan. Zen taught me to accept myself as is, my sort of wabi sabi self. So this story has come to disturb me as time goes by because I think as a culture we have typecast all of ourselves into Ugly Ducklings when we feel alienated and we never really feel self-actualized unless we are Swanned (case in point: the awful reality show a few years ago The Swan which carved up all the women contestants to look all like the same Victoria’s Secret model and then pitted them against each other – it was disturbing and it implied the ideas that “variety is not allowed!" and "Ethnicity is not allowed!”).

The Ugly Duckling also asks us to constantly seek approval from others. And folks, it just doesn’t come. Or if it does, it trickles in with too small of an amounts to appease your insecurities, even if you're Cher.

So you have to let go of the desire to get this mythical all-powerful acceptance and that’s the only way you’ll ever find peace. So what I’m saying little duck is, move on, let go.

I tried to write a poem about it years ago and surely didn’t quite get over what I was trying to say but…here it is:

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Cher Signs

Sign I am drawn to this and yet so very repelled by it at the same time.

Your celebrity obsession needs some restraint and should not spill out into your parking spaces, not to mention the very undemocratic idea of parking-space segregation.

Also, Mary Poppins says some outdoor time alone…away from your celebrity obsession is probably a healthy thing.

To buy your own:
http://www.amazon.com/CHER-PARKING-sign-street-music/dp/B00095LY42/ref=sr_1_21?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1232128870&sr=8-21

Bette’s Vegas Show

Showgirlmust Apparently Bette Midler is not selling tickets to her Vegas show as well as Cher's Vegas show is.

I’ve been debating this issue for the last few days. I’m thinking Bette’s crowd may be older or of a more confined age range and that Cher has had a more recent radio hit (1999 – not so recent when you think about it, but compared to Bette it is). Bette hasn’t had but one really monster hit or two (I can only think of "The Rose" and "Wind Beneath My Wings") and ticket buyers may be shopping for value, in other words a hit-packed show.

Not great news though as this works against Cher fans’ theory that Cher should do more of an art show.

   

Ask Cher Scholar: Loretta’s Wisdom

Moonstruck-Cher_l On Wednesday, July 20, 2005 Anna Pansini wrote:

How did Loretta, Cher’s character in “Moonstruck”, get to be so wise? I am referring to the scene in the kitchen with Nicholas Cage who says he is miserable because he has no life, but Loretta tells him that he’s afraid because deep inside he knows he’s a wolf that isn’t afraid to cut off his own hand to keep him from getting what he wants in life. My wonderment is from Loretta’s own life – she was married for a short time and then moved back in to live with her parents and has a ho-hum job for a mortician. In the beginning scenes of the movies, she looks and appears drab. She even agrees to marry a drab man with an equally blah life. So where did she get her wisdom?

Loretta is actually a freelance accountant working for a few clients, including her Aunt and Uncle’s convenience store, the mortician and a florist (remember Loretta kissing the rose?). This isn’t spelled out overtly but you can see her jumping from client to client in the first few scenes.

I don’t actually think Loretta is very wise in the beginning of the movie. The movie is really all about her process of getting wiser about the true nature of real love vs. a practical relationship of convenience. The scene in Ronny’s kitchen was really projection and her beginning to think about love in her own life. She can easily tell Ronny what his fears are but she can’t see her own. So she is telling Ronny what she needs to hear herself. Her life has been painful and she has responded by making safe choices or hiding from pain, precisely what she glibly criticizes Ronny for doing. This conversation is the catalyst that gets her to reconsider her choice to marry Johnnie. But at this point, she’s not really wise; she’s just a big talker.

Collecting Cher

Watch

At first I got excited that this article on collecting Cher stuff was out there! Finally, something I could send my parents to ensure them I’ve investing my money properly. 🙂

Who am I kidding?

This article addressed none of the financial advantages I’ve always hoped there’d be in collecting Cher junk. And the author, Victor, is a bit stodgy to boot.

Typical sentence:

“A complete discography of her collectibles is not something to be taken lightly. Ideally, a complete collection could be gathered, giving you something that can be proudly displayed.”

Proudly displayed? A Cher collection can take over your house. Or Basement. Or parents’ basement. Or storage facility B.

“You could also try collecting her t-shirts from all of her different tours. This could also be quite a task to complete as she has toured a number of different times. Gathering a complete collection of these shirts could prove to be a challenge, yet one that you could have a great deal of fun with.”

Victor lists possible avenues of collection: Records, the aforementioned t-shirts, autographed photos, autographed movie scripts, the S&C model cars, stuff from her perfume line, the “look-alike dolls,”  alarm clocks and night lights (Jesus, I don’t even have a Cher alarm clock!), wristwatches, trading cards, and musical instruments…

“can all bear her name and because of this, you would do well to add any of these items to your memorabilia collection…Cher has certainly always been a vibrant personality in our culture and building up a stock of her celebrity collectibles could not only be a bit of a challenge, but give you a great deal of fun in the meantime.”

Psst…Victor makes it sound WAY more boring than it actually is. I see that this is because he reuses  bland monosyllabic words over and over again in his piece. I’d recommend a thesaurus, which you can also have quite “a great deal of fun with.”
  
 

The Captain & Tennille Show

CandtshowFor Christmas, among other things (like the awesome Carol Burnette "Went with the Wind" doll), I received a collection of the Captain & Tennille variety show episodes which aired on ABC on Mondays from September 1976 to March 1977.

I can’t help but compare this show to The Sonny & Cher Show running at the same time. In the episodes I’ve seen so far there are far less skits on C&T and more musical numbers, sometimes more experimental (there was a word jazz segment with Penny Marshall, Tennille and Ron Palillo –Horseshack- and Lawrence Hilton Jacobs -Freddie Washington- from Welcome Back Kotter which was good) but for the most part the show is heavy on Tennille singing alone or with musical guests, including an amazing duet with Dionne Warwick. The Captain actually speaks on the show and is actually pretty charming and has good comedic timing. I like him. They’re talented to be sure. And I do love variety shows, pretty unconditionally, including this one. Trouble is, the show lacks something sparkly that S&C had, despite all the required rhinestones on Tennille’s dresses.

And in the premiere episode they go through a long joke setup with Jackie Gleason, mistaking each other for other iconic celebrities of the time culminating in Gleason confusing them with Sonny & Cher. Which was probably the big elephant in the room. “We’re not Sonny & Cher” the joke seemed to say.

Which is something all new variety seems to feel compelled to say, especially if co-hosted by a man and wife. Nick and Jessica Simpson were emphatic before their TV special a few years ago — we’re not trying to be Sonny & Cher.  Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne also recently declared their new show would not be a new Sonny & Cher. It’s kind of a back-handed compliment. They’re saying simultaneously, we’re not trying to copycat what has become known as the standard of couple-variety shows and we intend to be much cooler than that.

And that’s the fascinating paradox of Sonny & Cher. When they hit town in the 60s, they were hyper-cool, then in the mid-60s they were perceived as waning-cool. Then in the late 60s definitely not cool due to their anti-drug stance and the changing musical culture. Back on TV, they were cool kinda but not cool kinda because older people were now watching them.

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Holiday 2008

Franz-flagstaffThings have been a bit hectic lately and I’ve had trouble getting back into the swing of the day-to-day. My bf, the furkid and I went to Flagstaff for Christmas to kind of hole up…with some snow. It was much fun – our furkids first snow. We lavished him with Christmas gifts, which included a bounty of rawhides shaped like Christmas items. Soon, he was throwing up on the hotel carpet.

From Christmas to New Years I spent organizing my office. Not pleasant but it had to be done. And now I’ve got a long list of to-dos and touch-bases for the New Year which is keeping me quite busy. Plus the wedding stuff. We’ve organized a website and done drafts of the invitation and found a photographer. Personally, I’m a mess. My skin and hair and nails (and figure). So I’m implementing a beauty and exercise regime for the year. I’m annoyed at how much time it takes to maintain these things. I’d rather be reading.

But enough about me. There are oodles of Cher stuff to catch up on. Here we go – we have LOTS to cover so let’s get 2009 started!

Sonny Stuff (Festivals and Stamps)

Stamps-sonny-cher Sonny Palms Springs Film Festival Vision:
Here's an excellent essay from mydesert.com from Bruce Fessier on The Palm Springs Film Festival highlights through the years,  the celebrity drama, the very immediate impact Sonny's death had on the 1998 festival, and the big successes in showcasing some awesome movies.

I actually forwarded this article to two of my film-buff friends because the more I read the piece the more I realized it was an awesome Netflix list of great foreign and independent films of the last 20 years.

Also, it illustrates how important the festival momentum depended on fiscal management, donors, and gala events with red carpet attendance.

And how many films launched there went on to win Oscars:

"It illustrated how the festival circuit begins at Sundance and ends at Palm Springs just before the Oscar nomination announcements."[Fessier]

http://www.mydesert.com/article/20090104/EVENTS01/901020330/-1/lifestylesfront

The Sonny Stamp

I had a late-Christmas party last night with some friends (we were all too busy over the actual holiday to meet). We met at West Coast Subs in the Palms area of LA for boba and dinner and this is where my friend Christopher informed me that Cher and Mary Bono Mack were joining forces to petition for a Sonny Bono memorial stamp.

Awesome.

Shorenuff, Liz Smith confirms:

Cher, the one and only, tells us that she is lobbying the U.S. Postal Service to commemorate her late ex, Sonny Bono, with his own stamp. 

Cher says she would join forces with Congresswoman Mary Bono-Mack, who was married to Sonny at the time of his death, to make this honor a reality. And the U.S. Postal Service is keen to the idea. One high-up said, “A Sonny Bono stamp would be a lot of fun, especially if Cher would attend the dedication for it.

First of all:  the one and only? – that phrase is dated, pointless and dorkey. By now there are actually many other Chers in the world. I know this because their blog entries clog up my RSS feeds.

Oooh…I’m envisioning sending oodles of mail with Sonny stamps.  Do you think it will be 60s, 70s, 80s or 90s Sonny?

Stamps above from the site Stamp Magnets: http://stampmagnets.com/cgi-bin/search.cgi?type=search&search=minor&minor=Entertainers+-+Music&shop=stamp-search&amount=10&num=20

  

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