I Found Some Blog

a division of the Chersonian Institute

Page 112 of 113

Genie in the Bottle

ChergenesimmonsToday I was about to join the Official Cher fan club, especially since I recently received my Barry Manilow fanclub newsletter in the mail. Although I haven’t been much of a Barry Manilow fan since I was 15, I still enjoy their entertaining and informative fanclub activities. This bi-yearly newsletter was no exception, with photos of Barry’s August Las Vegas convention (which he attended) and his own heartfelt fan Q&A column. It was exceptional, I must say. But alas, the Official Cher Fanclub website will be down for days unknown due to some kind of update.

So I guess I’ll take this opportunity to chat about Cher peripherals. Peripherals are characters in the Cher orbit and may include children, lovers, co-workers, or the entourage. They have an interesting shelf-life in and of themselves. Peripherals like her kids would normally be afforded some kind of deference of privacy unless they make their own gestures towards fame, such as write autobiographical books, participate in reality TV shows or release industrial goth-rock albums (allmusic.com’s words, not mine). Cher has cute nicknames for these peripherals when she refers to them in press interviews. If they have names with more than two syllables, she breaks it down to one, such as Chastity to Chas or sister Georgeanne to Gee; if they have one-syllable names, she pops them up to two syllables, such as Gregg to Gregory or Gene to Genie.

I happen to be watching the Genie Simmons reality show these days as my friend Coolia is a KISS fan and Family Jewels on A&E is always on her Tivo. Cher and Gene were a media super-couple in the late 1970s. They met in February of 1978 at a party for California Governor Jerry Brown thrown by Casablanca record-label head Neil Bogart. The met just as Cher was beginning to make disco albums on the same label, which was also KISS’s label. To orient KISS fans, their relationship started just as KISS started making the TV kitsch-classic KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park. Gene and Paul Stanley (and Cher secretly) claimed to have hated disco at the time, although Casablanca was a heavily disco-centric label, also being the label to Diana Summer among other disco acts. Rumor had it the Take Me Home album cover Viking-fitSpacecher  was inspired by Gene and that Paul Stanley also dated Cher’s sister, Georgeanne. Common scenes in tabloids featured Gene with his face obscured by a handkerchief (because no one was supposed to see KISS without makeup until they relented this charade in the early 80s) and his arm around what appeared to be a suddenly very tiny Cher. None of her other boyfriends or husbands ever seemed so tall before.

Cher stories abound in endless KISS biographies. In KISS Behind the Mask (paperback pgs. 86-88), Gene talks about how Cher was the first real relationship of his life, how he thought Cher was “real Hollywood” and yet never really part of "that scene," how the industry felt their relationship was just a Casablanca publicity stunt.

You can also find juicy details about Gene’s feelings in his own biography, Kiss and Makeup (hardcover pg. 140-159). There’s a funny passage with Gene learning how to jog on the Malibu beach with Cher, Gene in leather pants and snakeskin boots. As if that wasn’t embarrassing enough, they run into Neil Diamond. Gene also recalls how they were refused habitation at The Dakota in New York City, the building depicted in Rosemary’s Baby and where John Lennon lived and where he was murdered. On page 140, there’s a picture apropos of the time, with Gene, Cher, Bill Sameth and Neil Bogart.

KISS and Sell the Making of a Supergroup (softcover pg 180-186) recants their relationship and the breakup as well, with Gene leaving to Diana Ross and Cher to Les Dudek.

Years after all this KISStory was published, I’ve seen many cocky Gene appearances, from record release parties to video interviews to lectures, all with Gene posing arrogant and debauched. The family series, although a far cry from surprising innocence of Ozzy in The Osbournes, turns this Gene-myth on its head. However, many of the situations on the show feel inauthentic, like phony reality show setups (such as long-time girlfriend Shannon Tweed sending Gene to fat camp and Gene bribing a driving instructor to win a driving test). Despite this, the take-away from the show is how decent Gene comes across and how normal and cool his kids, Sophie and Nick, seem to be, especially the witty and charming Nick. (If only I were 16, I’m just saying.) Tales of the playboy Gene seem like all too much shtick. This isn’t a far cry from what Cher told People Magazine circa 1978 and 1979 that underneath all the showbiz bravado, there was a big softie underneath.

There was a smattering of brouhaha involving Cher during early publicity for the show. Apparently on Howard Stern, Gene and Sharon bickered over the fact that Cher still sends Valentines to Gene. There’s also been one episode so far invoking Cher’s name. Cher sent Genie a picture of herself and Shannon tells of swapping out Cher’s photo but keeping the frame. It’s hard to take even this drama seriously when you watch Family Jewels. Shannon doesn’t sound convincingly pissed and one can’t but wonder if Cher was probably just professional networking.

 

Kiss and Make Up

Movieworld76april_1Okay. I feel bad about my last post. I’m sorry. I’ve been there, man. Once I told my family I was skipping vacation with them in order to camp out for tickets to a John Waite show. That obsessive moment is still part of family lore. However, my worst story took place when I was 13 or 14 years old. I freaked out when my Dad couldn’t get the VCR working to tape Cher on The Phil Donahue Show. The show was airing and not only was our VCR on the fritz, but so was the cable!I thought I was in the third circle of Hell. I had a bona fide conniption fit. My father calmly walked out of the room and refused to fix or repair anything for me for a year! I learned my lesson. Don’t freak out at the person trying to help you tape Cher on The Phil Donahue Show. Years later I saw a bootleg copy of the show. And believe me, finally watching it didn’t cause any revelations in my life; but I love collecting Cher stuff, there is no doubt. I am, myself, obsessed. I too am an introverted soul who has, in times past, found it easier to profess love for celebrities than for real people. Real people can be so nutty. The truth is if we knew them, celebrities would drive us nuts, too. Having the luxury of not knowing them makes it so much easier to love them.

And so the intervention I recommend is not a pill I wouldn’t swallow myself. For every thirty hours of celebrity obsession, do one hour of community service or one hour hour (at least) of self-education on world events if you can’t stand the thought of getting out there in the real world just yet. I wouldn’t give up my box of Cher magnets and I wouldn’t ask you to give up your worn-out six-inch single of “Wasn’t It Good.”

Friends?

What’s It All About….Alfie

Pic19490Something’s been nagging my craw the last two days: obsession with trivial things. Don’t say it! I know what you’re thinking. Let me just split hairs here for a minute. I’m specifically talking about people who freak out over trivial things due to their unchecked obsession. If you have an obsession, good for you. I’m not here to judge. Just don’t get your nylons in a snit over it is all I’m sayin’.

Who reminded me of this issue: 1) someone on the Cher Yahoo group who has been chronically upset about the Cher auction and 2) Yankee fans. The chronically upset Cher fan has been complaining about the inappropriateness of the Cher auction and poor Cher fans (as in Cher fans with no money not Cher fans with misfortunes such a living rooms never to be graced with the presence of a Cher end table). I like opinions. I’m all for opinions. It’s good to have an opinion and flex it. Especially on voting day. But this person is seriously upset, such as they say: beyond the pale. Her latest beef is over the high-priced hard cover auction catalog from Sotheby’s that has yet to arrive, days after the auction is over. Maybe Sotheby’s is waiting for Cher to sign them. We don’t really know. A frustrating delay—I agree. But this one’s really pissed off. Meanwhile, the recently departed Yankee player Cory Lidle (his private plane recently slammed into an Upper East Side Manhattan building) had to call into the New York Mike and the Mad Dog Radio radio program the day before his death to defend himself against comments such as this: “"Cory, tell me what other Yankee fan out there is getting to enjoy his Monday after you guys stunk the house out! Sorry pal, but people who make 20 million dollars a year to do a job don’t get to enjoy a day with their family when they didn’t do their job!" A day later, he’s dead.

Now why exactly couldn’t Mad Dog enjoy October 10, 2006? Because his neighborhood baseball team lost a season? A baseball team that wins pretty much every other freakin season? That’s what makes it impossible for him to function as a happy person?

Be careful when you’re a fan. Is this a life and death interest for you? Does this team or person actually improve your quality of life? Be honest. Does this team or person help you earn a living? Can your team or person influence or alter world events? Has this team or person directly helped you in some way that didn’t involve just being there for you? Did their “being there for you” at any time involve a ticket of admission or receipt from Tower Records? It’s very possible you may be taking the fan relationship too personally. I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news. You’re obsessed. Unless you’re a fan of Bono (and it’s still questionable what influence he’ll have on the world all at the end of the day). Maybe a baseball player or an artist is some hero of yours, maybe they keep you from a daily descent into the blues. So be it. It’s not war and death. Short of war and death and your local Piggly Wiggly strike, calm down. Some of you are celebrity obsessed and your affliction is creepy. Go watch Animal Planet and talk yourself down! Or better yet, go read the news. No People Magazine or Sports Illustrated for a week for you!

The Kurt Loder Style of Public Speaking

Mejavierchristopher Last Thursday, October 5, I was also on The Megan Mullally Show for one split second. Last July, they did some coverage of the Cher Convention. I did an interview for them, my friend Christopher Brisson read some Cher haikus and they covered the events of the day, including the Cher seminar and the Family Feud game which I hosted. I was more than a tad worried they would do a Daily Show aren’t-these-people-loony sort of send-up of us based on a review of the show I had read two weeks ago. I was sweating bullets actually. I’m a Cher dork. Does America have to see me in action? I mean seriously, I can hide behind the blog. I resolved to tell no one if I found out when the show would air. Okay, not that I don’t deserve it, mind you. Obsessive behavior deserves a kick in the pants once in a while. I’m with the program, believe me. I just hate to watch myself getting the kick in the pants. But thank Buddha, they were kind. I let out a sigh of relief after the swift showing of my disheveled self passed in a lineup of Cher Scholars: Christopher, me and Javier waxing authoritatively on The Cher Show. Hours after this shot was taken (see above), I was over buying a Cher beach towel when the man running my credit card mentioned he had heard me leading the seminar. He said it was very interesting and that I had a writer’s cadence of speaking. He said “you can get over that.” What? Did he just say I talk like Kurt Loder? Which means basically I suck at public speaking, right? I thew him a fake smile and walked away with my Cher towel. Thankfully none of this horrific stiffness can be seen on Megan Mullally. You will see Phil Costa showcasing his impressive Cher trivia knowledge. Phil has entered Convention trivia contests for many years now and always came in second place due to a bad bit of luck. It’s great to see him get spotlight for his trivia prowess. There’s also funny coverage of twins Wanda Corn and Linda Vala, but unfortunately no mention of the fundraisee, the Children’s Craniofacial Association. Did someone stick a very bad wig on my head while I wasn’t looking? What is that?

People….People Who Need People…

Halloweendog I’ve only been blogging for a week and I’m already behind. There just so much to talk about: auction wrap-up, Cher-kid activity, my favorite Cher sites, goings on in forum chat, the Convention, Cher outfit watch. Today I planned to talk about some Cherities as I’d been razing Cher’s massive redecorating efforts and wanted to take a moment to discuss her more noble causes. But it’s week two and I’m already feeling overwhelmed and wishing Cher would take a Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous moment to San Tropez so I can catch my breath.

This past weekend I took some time to answer initial feedback and response to the I Found Some Blog and it reminded me I should take a moment to discuss the unheralded but steadfast Cher fan community the auction had recently put me back in touch with.

At the auction preview, I spoke with impersonator Chad Michaels and fans Erika DeCiutiis (contributor to the first Cher Zine) and Javier Ozuna (who ran this year’s museum at the convention and spoke on the seminar panel). I also connected with fans on the yahoo group Cher—about Halloween costumes and controversy regarding the auction. See? I don’t even have time to talk about that! In a nutshell, many fans were defending Cher’s choice to auction off her discards;  but a few claimed she was making a fool of her fans and “laughing all the way to bank.” My note to fans who are still upset about not snagging an overpriced Cher shawl: Go visit Starwares.  Maybe due to all this bickering, no one seemed to be posting on their auction winnings. Maybe they were embarrassed, having spend too much on a pair of Raybans. I came out and brazenly asked, did anyone I know clinch anything?

A few did. One fan picked up a costume for 8k, another bought the child-sized Cher show jacket for a little over 1k. Eileen Bovee picked up a book with some Cher scrawl in it and the Pascal Morabito reversible watch (lot #426) for 3k. Another fan got a French gilt-metal picture frame (lot #742) for a steal at $650.

I also leaned that LA-based, kitschy slide-show archivist Charles Phoenix was at the auction doing a story for NPR. He mentioned the Hearst Castle connection as noted by Ape Culture during the preview. He also interviewed Bob Mackie himself and a representative from Comisar, a large archivist of TV memorabilia, who was willing to outbid fans for Bob Mackie dresses which Comisar called touchstones of the 70s, worth many thousands of dollars.

By last Friday I felt like I had been to a business conference and had passed out business cards like Willy Loman to familiar cohorts I run into once every few years. Through casual emails you do come to know more about fellow fans than just Cher stuff. It’s nice to find out what else is going on in other lives. How’s your husband? How’s work going? Thanks for including me in that mass mailing of dogs in Halloween outfits.

I’m just feeling my way through this blogging stuff but I think I’m learning what sets the medium apart from diary posts on a website. For some reason, blogging is a more seamless way of connecting with people. It’s like a website has this invisible wall separating the creator from the readers. Blogging is not just the sum of its cold facts and flat opinions…and it certainly has the power to rise above extensively self-absorbed diatribery. I’m surprised to find there’s something more social about it, possibly even something more human.

Battle of the Brows

Prococcini I met Lisa Manzi last spring in Colrain, Massachusetts. We were both attending the Colrain Poetry Manuscript Conference in a B&B where we slept in cubbyholes accessible only by stepladders. We also had dinner conversations with up-and-coming poets, many whom were trying to prove they were the Alpha Poet. (This means you’ve read more poetry than anyone else and feel pretty darn smug about it.) It was during one of these dinners that I learned Lisa was a) a person who had varied interests in non-poetry-type things (ex. pop culture) and b) she was also an art appraiser by trade. So I emailed her after the auction and asked her what she thought of Sinatraneiman Cher’s art sales, specifically why the highbrow Procaccini picture (lot #43) didn’t hit its estimated price of $30-50,000 and sold for only $25,000 and the lowbrow LeRoy Neiman did so well, estimated at $4-6,000 and selling for $40,000. Lisa said the Procaccini was hurt by Sotheby’s listing; collectors would see it and figure Sotheby’s did not support the attribution (that it was a real Procaccini). She said however, that the Neiman sale price was good, that his stuff is hard to sell because they all look so similar and are there are so many.
 

Cher Leaves Elton John Auction in Roll of Dust

Armidillo_lamp Recently Elton John emptied out his closets for $1.67 million. My KISS-loving friend, Ape Culture co-editor, Julie Wiskirchen, challenged Cher to meet the KISS auction total of $1.6 million a few years ago. Cher’s total hit $3.5 million. Once again, Cher kicked some serious buttage. Her Bentley was reported to be the highest sale. One fan bought three TV show dresses: the cream Titanic dress she wore to the Academy Awards, the Dark Lady dress and the Laverne fit. For them all, he spent over $40,000. Julie and I continued our IM conversation during Wednesday’s auction. Instead of summarizing it, I’ll give you the highlights below. A word regarding our IM handles: they both pertain to ridiculous scandals involving our respective celebrity obsessions.

OzzyBat: yo rib

RemovedCherRib: yo bat

OzzyBat: how is day 2 of the auction

RemovedCherRib: some fans think the big costume bidders are Hard Rock Cafe

OzzyBat: they bought a lot of kiss stuff

RemovedCherRib: a sketch just sold for 7k… the exact amount that the actual costume sold for

OzzyBat: Cher’s dictionary is coming up…i bet its never been opened….Now this is cool… lot 681….taxidermied armadillo lamp…given to cher by gene simmons!! That’s so funny – i thought it way cool before i even saw that…i might spend spend for that conversation piece

RemovedCherRib: the pugin stuff is going now…not outrageously

OzzyBat: what do you think that lamp will go for? it’s ugly – i cant imagine anyone other than me wanting it

RemovedCherRib: i don’t know but that’s the lamp i took a picture of Christopher cocking his head over wondering what it was…Gothic Ornaments is up…Gothic dog costumes must be next

OzzyBat: the wigs are coming up…the hummer is the final item…who will have 80k left by then for it? Imagine cher’s reaction to the armadillo lamp:  "genie, you’re crazy – shannon, you can have him"

RemovedCherRib: Georgeanne…can you put this somewhere?

OzzyBat: Elijah: "that’s wicked!

OzzyBat: i wish there was a booby doll from witches…especially the giant one

RemovedCherRib: 81 is up next…the dictionary

OzzyBat: i’m watching

OzzyBat: sure you dont want if for xmas?

RemovedCherRib: no… i’d rather have cher dolls for my tree

OzzyBat: geez nevermind anyway – $375!…$2,000 for a gothic furniture book? Geez. i guess i dont have a prayer for the lamp…the kids-size cher show jacket is coming up. $425? – do they know its a kids jacket? Sold for $1,050 – a tiny jacket o’ nylon

RemovedCherRib: these sketeches kill me, they aren’t even memorable dresses some of them…the carol burnette and charo ones are coming up…i’m curious to see what will happen

OzzyBat: $3,750 for the disco dress  – that was a cool one. This reminds me of the old SNL sketch with jon lovitz as Picasso. He kept scribbling on napkins and things and declaring "i’m picasso!" Like every scribble he made was worth millions….this purse up now may be the ugliest one ive ever seen in my life

RemovedCherRib: laverne is up to 9k

OzzyBat: could you write behind that desk? i would be too depressed…lot 550 – another depressingly dark gothic furniture item

OzzyBat: floor bidder slits wrist

OzzyBat: internet bidder hangs self

OzzyBat: internet bidder throws self down stairs

RemovedCherRib: internet bidder bangs head against keyboard and accidentally bids 3 thousand dollars

OzzyBat: floor bidder vincent libretti cashes in 401k to buy laverne fit

OzzyBat: floor bidder says "it gets me off"

RemovedCherRib: pugins bed is up now…the one andrew lloyd weber wanted

OzzyBat: i’m watching

RemovedCherRib: i wonder if anyone was allowed to sleep in such an expensive bed

OzzyBat: the bed is approaching the value of my dads condo….sold to lloyd webber!….cuz who else could spend 70k on a bed?

OzzyBat: has anything gone for less than 500 today?

RemovedCherRib: one of the purses went for 450….some shoes

RemovedCherRib: the last sketch I liked is going out of range…i like it cos it has cher scribbled by Mackie but is a short hair version of her the Take it To the Limit outfit i really liked from Celebration at Caesars….it’s like a hole fit but it’s a white hole shirt….Sold for $3,750…sigh…

RemovedCherRib: According to a Yahoo news report only 200 people were there bidding on the floor yesterday [there were up to 4,500 approved bidders overall.]…According to Yahoo: "[people] chuckled as the auctioneer [Hugh Hildesley] offered his own observations of taste, describing a yellow [it was really orange] plastic portable record player, circa 1976 as a ‘thing of beauty.’ It sold for $1400."

RemovedCherRib: Penelope and the suitors painting went for $60,000

RemovedCherRib: the second hole fit went for $50,000! Gosh! The fit christopher called the sausage arm one

OzzyBat: these bids dont seem to be getting lower…i guess i dont have a prayer of getting the lamp…it’s an important piece of KISStory

RemovedCherRib: it’s coming up

RemovedCherRib: it’s up

OzzyBat: sadness…i was the two internet bidders way back before 400

RemovedCherRib: $3500!

RemovedCherRib: ridikilous

OzzyBat: insanity

RemovedCherRib: the worlds gone mad

OzzyBat: i’m devastated…all day i was thinking how cool that would look in the living room…"oh you’re admiring my armadillo lamp? let me tell you the story…"

RemovedCherRib: seriously though, it would frighten people

OzzyBat: it would, but i liked that about it…it’s the only thing in the auction that was really me…besides the bentley of course….cuz thats how i roll

Sconce Watch

Leroyneiman_1Cher is headline news today (Yahoo!) after one day of auctioning is over. It was quite a hoot to be able to watch the auction online via ebay all day while I was working. A few items hit the estimated range, some never hit the estimated value (oak altar elements went for $1,600 instead of the estimated $2,000) but the majority of the items went far above the estimated values set by Juliens Auctions. Three cross wall sconces went for $1,000 and were estimated at only $500 max. Her first "hole fit" (a piece of Cher show history no doubt as so many more were to follow) went for $7,500. It was an extra $1,900 for the sagging lifeless 369_3 blue and pink boa. Bob Mackie sketches went over $2,000 almost every time, up to $4,750 for the Half Breed sketch. The LeRoy Neiman pictured top went for $40,000, Sonny boots for $1,100, her high school yearbook for $2,200 and the Bentley $170,000. I chatted with friend a Ape Culture co-editor, Julie, over instant messenger while part of the auction was occurring. She sent me to the LeRoy Neiman website where many hyperbolic sentences were found about his fine reputation in America as well as many other celebrity and sports portraits to be chuckled over. Julie was interested in lot #369, a gothic revival style mahogany bed but then she decided she didn’t want to sleep in anything Elijah might have tied Heather Graham to.

   

First the Wig and Now This

The auction has been burgled. Just when you thought this free and open society thing was working. But seriously, this is no joke. Fellow scholar Javier Ozuna was asked yesterday by Julien’s Auctions and Sotheby’s to get the word out in case someone visits a Cher friend in the next few days and sees a continental cold-painted bronze figural lamp (lot #626) sitting on a TV tray. The estimated height is 19 inches and the value is estimated at: $800-1200. Now, don’t steal it from the thief! I know it’s tempting to develop an insatiable need to have something you never really wanted two days ago. But contact the auction houses immediately. You can’t run from the law forever. Trust me; that’s no life. Apparently the bandit entered the ladies room and removed the tag there, which was all caught on camera by security. There’s a security camera in the ladies room??? I guess we can all assume our our perp is a chick. Or Eddie Izzard.

You can view the auction live today and tomorrow.   

The Bidders are Coming! The Bidders are Coming!

AuctionsignsmThe Cher Auction is upon us! This means both Crazy Queens and Senseless Straighties will be coming out of the woodwork to try and finagle a nappy wig once worn by Cher. Are you absolving yourself? Or are you all a fluster such as when it was 10 am and time to log on to ticketbastard in search of floor seats each time a final farewell date was announced? Will you have to mistype “mytsmerf” three times in a panic? 

   

You still have time to search your soul: to bid or not to bid. But remember, Julien’s auction house requires that you pre-register with them to participate. Get forms from their website. And if you plan to bid from home on Ebay Live, you have to pre-register there as well.

   

But hey, who am I to judge? I still haven’t decided whether I’m going to pay my health insurance this month or buy me some Cher shoes. Where did I put my priorities? I know they’re around here somewhere. Stay tuned to find out what embarrassing thing I do…and to chat about the fan controversy surrounding the dissemination of Cher couture unto the masses.

    

After my visit to The Beverly Hilton Friday, September 29, 2006, to see the auction preview, I wrote a story for Ape Culture. I saw a very popular Cher impersonator there and some friendly Cher fan faces. I also took many photos and included some pix included in the press packet CD, which I’m sure you’ve already seen ‘cos you’ve bought your auction catelogues like superfans!

   

There are also some good pictures of auction items on Getty Images.

   

 

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2026 I Found Some Blog

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑